Title: ???? (again;_;)
Rating: PG-13 to R
Pairing: read to find out^^
Warning: crack, attemped humor, crack, and some surprises^^
Summary: when the dong bang boys want to visit.
Author's note: semi crossover, but if you read it, you'll see why^^
It all started one fine, beautiful, and wonderful day. The members of the dong bang house decided to pay suju a visit. So they hunkered down in their hats and sunglasses (with a mask for Junsu for he had a bit of a cold) and traveled over to the suju house. What they saw when they got there was nothing they were prepared for.
Why couldn't they let me sleep in today? We had the day off for crying out loud. But, nnnnnooooooo, we just all have to be awake to say hi to the dong bang boys. You don't need all 13 of us to do that, but Hyukjae suggested we should and with Sungmin on his side giving the puppy dog eyes, Kangin was easily persuaded. Eeteuk couldn't really be bothered for he just wanted to go to sleep. So here I am, barely there, with drool running down the side of my face, and all I could think about was "I hope they're aliens so I could act stupid and sneak back to my room for more sleep. I mean, really, do I have to believe in them all the time?"
Donghae sure seems like he's still sleep. You would think he'd be happy that Yunho was coming today. I know that I’m happy that Junsu is coming so I can really show everyone who really owned who back in the day. I can't believe he would say all that crap when I was the reason he even got dates back then. Some friend he is. Uh oh, someone forgot to put on a pot of coffee so now yehsung hyung is attempting murder on an unsuspecting Shindong. I think I’ll just watch and wait for Junsu in the living room.
Why me? All I did was go in the kitchen for something to eat and now I got a rabid yehsung on my back. It wasn't my turn to put on a pot of coffee this morning. When I see whoever it was turn to make the damn coffee, they will pay. Oh look, it's Donghae, maybe he wouldn't mind taking yehsung, but with that glare directed at me, I just he read my mind. Oh well, I shall be remembered as the pleasantly plump one.
How f*cking hard is it to put on a f*cking pot of coffee?!? I mean, all you have to do is put water in the damn machine and it will f*cking make the damn stuff. It seems like I have to kill someone around to get sh*t done. Oh look, it's Shindong, he won't be missed much, I think I’ll attack him. But damn, he just won't go down and I have to- do I smell coffee? Yay! Coffee^^ I thank thee who madeth this coffee. Now we shall remain 13 members strong and the world will be a better place and yay, coffee never tasted so good as it does this moment.
I should save shindong since he always eats my food and never complains (unlike that fruit Heechul). So I’ll put on a pot of coffee and watch Yehsung turn into an angel (unlike that fruit Heechul). And maybe I’ll get a thank you or two and be held as the one who saved Shindong. But first I have to get everyone else up. It seems that Eeteuk won't be getting up any time soon and Sungmin is still in his pjs. Kangin looks like he's up and tell me why I got stuck in a room with Heechul? I didn't do anything to deserve that. Is it because I’m chinese? Those bastards, see if I cook anything for them. All night "Hannie, I’m bored" or "Hannie I want something to eat" or " Hannie, rub my feet" or "Hannie, teach me this, that, or the other." I really hate suju right about now.
Hankyung hyung looks like he's in "I must kill suju" mode. It’s not my fault that he was late getting home, thus stuck with Heechul. Serves him right for staying out late. Time to wake up my Sungminnie. Oh, he's up. Now Korea’s #1 romantic will romanticize Sungminnie into my bed. Maybe I’ll get him another bunny or two. Or maybe I’ll get him chocolates. Or maybe I’ll write him poetry...
Kangin’s at it again. How many times do I have to say "I’ll think about" before he gets the hint that I’m not interested? I swear, if I get another bunny, I’ll scream. And how much chocolate can one person eat? Surely not as much as him buying me some every ten minutes (which is better than when it was every five minutes). Maybe if I tell him that I like someone else, he'll leave me alone. Uh oh, Hankyungie looks mad. Don’t worry my secret love, I shall massage your shoulders and hold you till you sleep^^
No one said that Hankyung had to stay with me. He knows how I get. So why doesn't he just stand up for himself for once and say no? Stupid bastard. Oh look, Kangin the beast is up going after the wannabe beauty Sungmin who only got chinese on his mind at the moment. I think it's funny how this is a wannabe love triangle (since Shihan is real), but maybe they think it's fan service. I know better (cause I know all). I wonder where Shiwon is, anyway? I know Eeteuk is down for the count and you won't hear from the other part of KRY till about noon. And Kibum is m.i.a. Wonder where he's at, too?
Shihan is real? Ha! It’s only fan service, plus, Hannie got his own thing going on. But who am I really with? Kim Kibum. That’s right. And now I am kissing Kim Kibum. Good thing he only sleeps in his boxers and I sleep nude, or this would have been unnecessarily long. And wow, Kibum has gotten better with his hands. Well, I would continue with this little dialogue, but I gots a Kibum to attend to.
*Is unavailable right now. Please leave you name and number, and he'll get back at you after shiwon finishes banging the crap out of him. Thank you and have a good day^^*
I heart cherries. I really do. That’s why I got a mini fridge in my room filled with them. All types of cherries. That’s why I can't be concerned about Yehsung and his coffee addiction. That stuff is nasty anyway. But cherries, cherries are god. I can't believe no one loves cherries that much (not like I would share if they did). So I think I’ll just stay in this here room and eat my cherries.
I know why I was put in this group. To be the somewhat sane one. Well, to hell with that. I’m here to sleep with whoever might be horny. Maybe I’ll try Donghae; he's at his most gullible when he's half sleep. Or maybe Shindong, big men need love, too. Maybe Yehsung might be good after he gets to his tenth cup of coffee. Well, whoever wants some Kyuhyun lovin, you know where I’ll be~^^~
Well, of course, walking into this would make anyone leave. But when you realize that everyone has left you, once again, you think to yourself "it sucks being the youngest, but what ever happened to eeteuk?"
When I finally managed to wake up, what I saw did not surprise me one bit. Hyukjae and Junsu were talking like they haven't seen each other in years. That was before Hyukjae decided to make out with Junsu to prove who owns whom. Donghae decided to do his whole aliens bullsh*t to sneak off for more sleep. Hankyung manages to get both Sungmin and Kangin to agree to a threesome, and so they wandered off to do that. Yehsung and Jaejoong were both drinking coffee ("Yehsung's fifth, Jaejoong's fourth" Kyuhyun said while dragging Shindong to another room, the filthy wh*re). Yunho decided to be princess's knight in shining amour by doing everything he says. Yoochun managed to convince Ryeowook to share by sticking his tongue down his throat. Shibum is still going at it (hence the reason why I’m up). So that leaves me with the delectable Choikang Changmin looking rape-able and I can't find myself a good reason why not to do what I want to do. I am the oldest around, and after a kiss or two, he won't be complaining^^
yup yup^^ tis the end. show some love if you like it^^ and thank you to all that reads and leaves with some sanity^^