July 7th, 2004

Kurt

Here's for the moron who think Bush "isn't bad"

This individual seeks an executive position. He will be available next
January, and is willing to relocate.
RESUME
GEORGE W. BUSH
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC 20520

EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:

Law Enforcement:
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not available.

Military:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use. By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.

College:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C average. I was a cheerleader.

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and lost. I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock. I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money. With the help of my father and our
friends in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS:

- I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the Union. During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in America.

- I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed money.

- I set the record for the most executions by any governor in American history.

- With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:

- I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record.

- I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one billion dollars per week.

- I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.

- I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history.

- I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.

- I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.

- I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market. In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs and that trend continues every month.

- I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history. My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her.

- I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. President.

- I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations.

- My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History: Enron.

- My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to ensure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision.

- I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton against investigation or prosecution. More time and money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history.
-I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed.

- I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history.

- I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.

- I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any President in U.S. history.

- I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the history of the United States government.

- I've broken more international treaties than any President in U.S. history.

- I am the first President in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.

- I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.

- I refused to allow inspector's access to U.S. "prisoners of war" detainees, and have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.

- I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. elections).

- I set the record for fewest numbers of press conferences of any President since the advent of television.

- I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period. After taking off the entire month of August 2001, I presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history.

- I garnered the most sympathy ever for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most hated country in the world---the largest failure of diplomacy in world history.

- I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people),shattering the record for protests against any person in the history of mankind.

- I am the first President in U.S. history to order an
unprovoked, preemptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S.citizens, and the world community.

- I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families in wartime.

- In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on our British friends.

- I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security.

- I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD.

- I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden to justice.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES:

-All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view.

- All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.

- All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my
Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004!
Kurt

MEAH!

>>~~~~Basics~~~~
>>
>>Full Name: Morgan Courtney Richardson
>>
>>Age: 18
>>
>>What school: SCTI
>>
>>Righty or Lefty: Righty
>>
>>Siblings: Brenna
>>
>>Pets: (dog) Shelby
>>

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>>~~~~~YOUR LOOKS~~~~~
>>
>>
>>Hair Color: Brown
>>
>>Eyes: Blue
>>
>>Do you wear contacts or glasses: nope
>>
>>Do you wear any rings: 1 on my left thumb, and 1 on my left ring finger
>>
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>>~~~~~JUST LATELY~~~~~
>>
>>How are you today: Eh...I just woke up and so far I could be doing better.
>>
>>What pants are you wearing: Boxers
>>
>>What shirt are you wearing: Big baggy Bush t-shirt (the band not the asshole)
>>
>>What does your hair look like at the moment: up
>>
>>What song are you listening to right now: Ahhhh the sweet sound of nothing
>>
>>What was the last thing you ate? Frosted Flakes (they're grrrrrreeeeeeeaaaaatttt!)
>>
>>How is the weather right now: Sunny and hot and humid cuz Florida fucking sucks.
>>
>>The last person you talked to on the phone: My boyfriend
>>
>>Who are you talking to right now?: No one
>>
>>What time is it? 9:11am
>>
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>>~~~~~MORE ABOUT YOU~~~~~
>>
>>What are the last four digits of your phone?: 0392
>>
>>If you were a crayon what color would you be?: Hot Pink
>>
>>
>>Have you ever almost died: I was really close to being in a car accident once, that I'm sure if I hadn't swerved and spun out I would have been killed.
>>
>>What makes you happy: My boyfriend, pot, my friends, pot, accomplishing important things, and....pot.
>>
>>What's the next cd you are going to buy: Not really sure
>>
>>Have you ever won any special awards: Ya, just can't remember what they were cuz they were in like middle school. haha
>
>>
>>Do/ Done drugs: I smoke pot and dabble in X and coke occasionally.
>>
>>What sport do you like to watch the most? none
>>
>>How many TV's do you have in your house: 4
>>
>>Do you have your own phone line: No, but I have a cell with FREE INCOMING CALLS! Wo0t!
>>
>>Do you sleep with stuffed animals: No
>>
>>Place for a dream house: Seattle, WA.
>
>>Have you ever sprained/broken/fractured a bone: My finger
>>
>>Who do you tell your dreams to: No one unless it was worht telling about
>>
>>Who is the loudest friend: Me hehe
>>
>>FAV. DRINK: Sweet tea

>>Who is the quietest friend: Lena
>>
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

>>~~~~~JUST QUESTIONS~~~~~
>>
>>Is cheerleading a sport: Fuck no
>>
>>How many licks does it take to get to the center?: Depends on how good you can lick it!
>>
>>
>>Which came first the chicken or the egg: My nuts
>>
>
>>
>>
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>>~~~~~YOU AND LOVE~~~~~
>>
>>Do you believe in love? yes
>>
>>Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend: yes
>>
>>Do you have a crush: no
>>
>>Who is your crush?: I told you I don't have one
>>
>>Did you send this to your crush: WTF?
>>
>>Do you believe in love at first sight: No
>>
>>What song do you want played at your wedding: "Echo" by Incubus
>>
>>Are you too shy to ask someone out: yes
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>>~~~~~GIRLS FILL OUT ONLY~~~~~
>>
>>Boxers of Briefs: Boxers!
>>
>>Long or short hair : Either
>>
>>tall or short: Tall
>>
>>Six pack or muscular arms: Arms

>>Good or Bad Boy: BAD!
>>
>>Hat or no hat: Depends
>>
>>Ears pierced or not: Pierced, although it's not an issue
>>
>>Tan or fair: Tan
>>
>>Stubble or clean shaven: Shaven
>>
>>Rugged or sporty: What's the difference?
>>
>>Studly or cutie: Cutie
>>
>>Accent or not: I LOVE British accents
>>
>>Glasses: No
>>
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>>~~~~~GUYS FILL OUT ONLY~~~~~
>>

>>Painted nails or not:
>>
>>Cute and mysterious or wild and sexy:
>>
>>Dressy or casual:
>>
>>long or short hair:
>>
>>What color eyes:
>>
>>Long or short nails:
>>
>>Hat or no hat:
>>
>>Hair up or down:
>>
>>Accent or no accent:
>>
>>Pants or dress:
>>
>>Tan or fair:
>>
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>>~~~~~PICK THIS OR THAT~~~~~
>>
>>Lights on/off: Off
>>
>>MickeyDs or Burger King?: McDonalds
>
>>Backstreet Boys or NSync: They both suck ass
>>
>>Summer or Winter: Winter
>>
>>tape or CD: CD
>>
>>Mud or Jell-O wrestling: Jell-O
>>
>>Skiing or boarding: BOARDING!
>>
>>Cake or pie: Pie
>>
>>Diamond or pearl: Diamond

>>Sunset or sunrise: Sunset
>>
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>>~~~~~HAVE YOU EVER~~~~~
>>
>>Loved someone so much it made you cry: Yes
>>
>>Ran from the cops: Yes (and I got away too!)
>>
>>Drank: Uh...LOTS!
>
>>Made yourself cry to get out of trouble??: Of course!

>>Do you like filling these things out? Eh...it passes the time.
>>

(no subject)

You win no support by resorting to personal attacks and foul language. Strive to win arguments, not argue.


Hey, does anyone here play "The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind"? I've become hopelessly addicted, and if anyone else plays we should ecxhange information. I know where some really cool things are hidden.
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