First off, i want to thank everyone for their support and personal experiences on medication. It helps to hear that i am not alone.
But STILL, i can't stop binging! everyday. it's controlling my life and i've eaten so much.
I hate to ask for more advice on such short notice... but what do you guys do when you are in the panicked state of a binge? I've tried listening to the Geneen Roth audio tapes, brushing my teeth, gum, distracting myself, etc... it really feels like i've tried everything. I hate myself for this. i feel like a failure. i just want to STOP.
sorry about the rant again.
I was wondering if this has happened to any other lifetime members that have gone above their goal weights...
When I started on WW about 2 years ago, I weighed around 160. I lost 35 pounds and got to my lowest, 125. My goal weight was 130, and even at that I felt GREAT about myself. Slowly I got lazy and started gaining.
At 139.8 lbs I recommited because I saw a pic of myself and couldnt believe how fat I looked. Since I recommited three weeks ago I have lost 6 pounds and am down to 133.8. But I still feel like a blimp. Like, everytime I look at myself I feel so fat.
I think this might be because after being 160 for so long, when I reached 130, I thought I was so skinny. Then after almost a year of maintaining 130ish, anything higher makes me feel so fat.
I guess maybe my body image has changed since I lost the 35 pounds. But right now, I realize that I am technically only 3.8 pounds over my goal weight and I feel gross still. I think I LOOK gross. How much difference does 3.8 pounds make? I wouldnt think it would make that much of a difference in the mirror...but I still cant help but feel big.
Any other lifetime members have this shift in body image? Im not sure if it's good for me (because at least I know I probably wont let myself get up to 160 again if 140 feels fat), or it's bad because anything higher than 125 automatically makes me think Im disgusting. Sorry if Im babbling or this doesnt make sense, but its something that has really been bothering me lately. So...how do I get over this?
I am seriously frustrated.
I have been on program and gaining and I want to just give up and say screw it.
Before the holiday madness started I was down to 195 (started at 206.5 in early november so I was thrilled). AFter Xmas I was up to 200...then a few days ago back to 202. GAWD! I have been back on track. I hate that I am still 5 more than I was over a month ago.
I don't know why I'm posting even. I know I'm whining. :(
I am heading to a cabin up north this weekend (holy crap it's going to be cold) and we'll be hot tubbing (great...bathing suit fear!), and I can assume eating and drinking a lot. I am afraid I will give in and go nuts.
If you have any advice (STOP WHINING MELISSA hehe) I will gladly take it!
I'm so proud of myself. I stayed on program all day, and I just did a 5 point work out that I almost didn't even do!
Oh, and seeing all of the communities food ideas really helped me out.
For tomorrow I have planned:
breakfast:egg, toast, margarine (4 points)
snack:small apple (1 point)
lunch:tuna w. light mayo (4 points)
two cheese (2 points)
celery and baby cucumber (0 points)
cherries (1 point)
granola bar (2 points)
snack:baby carrots with dip (1 point)
snack:one cheese (1 point), finishing whatever else I don't eat earlier
This is all I've planned so far, but I think it is a pretty healthy start. I never know what I'll be having for dinner until the evening, so I can't plan it now. I think that having the granola bar will help me to not feel deprived of a 'bar' type snack, which I love. I'm just looking at this meal, at how healthy it is, and I just know that after a week or two of eating like this I'm going to get SICK of it. But, it's the only way to be healthy. Does anyone have advice on how to not get tired of eating healthily, when all I want to do is eat pizza and bowls of white pasta all the time?
My other weakness is when other people have snacks around and offer them (also sometimes when friends have food that I want, and I know they'd give me a piece if I asked, I just can't not ask for some). Any advice, or coping tactics?
haven't been on plan for months. my first semester of grad school and tumultuous relationship issues killed me. i had lost 50 pounds since january 31, 2007. now i have gained back at least 20. i dont want to go back to the way i was, i dont.
For those of you who are emotional eaters, how did you learn to get that under control?