YOUR CHILDREN DESERVE LEXCORP JETPACKS (yesthatnagia) wrote in _terzarima,
YOUR CHILDREN DESERVE LEXCORP JETPACKS
yesthatnagia
_terzarima

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Grok, being attacked!

And you smoked with the ghost in the back of my head.



Cloud finally broke down and bought the engagement ring (henceforth known as TR). He needed a place to store TR where Tifa wouldn't see it and guess what he was going to do. So he went to the WRO main office and was like, "Reeve, can I borrow the Third Drawer On the Left Side of Your Desk for TR?" and Reeve was all, "what's a desk drawer between friends? Yeah, whatever, go ahead."

The plan was, Cloud would run by at four and pick up TR, take it to the restauarant, and then meet Tifa there again for dinner at.... midnight.

Problem. Cloud was too busy with... something, and didn't get to grab TR.

So, at seven PM, Cloud calls Yuffie.

CLOUD: Yeah, I can't get in touch with Reeve, and I can't break into places like this, and, uh, I NEED A HUGE FREAKING FAVOUR.

YUFFIE: You're such a pain. What I gotta do?

CLOUD: Break into Reeve's office for me. Call me when you get there.

YUFFIE: WHAT. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. HE'D KILL ME. HIS SECURITY GURARDS WOULD KILL ME. NO FREAKING WAY.

CLOUD: Milkshakes?

YUFFIE: NO, NOT EVEN FOR MILKSHAKES.

*click*




CLOUD: Uh, Vincent, hi.

VINCENT: Yes?

CLOUD: You're about the only person Yuffie listens to. Could you have her call me?

VINCENT: ...I will try.

*click*




VINCENT: Cloud.

CLOUD: What.

VINCENT: She refuses to speak to you.

CLOUD: ...Crap. Well, in that case, could you ask her to do me a favour? Tell her I left something of Tifa's in Reeve's office and absolutely gotta have it before eleven PM.

VINCENT: ...

*click*




YUFFIE: Vinnie! Hihihihihi!

VINCENT: ...Please do Cloud this favour. Apparently, he left something of Tifa's in Reeve's office.

YUFFIE: ...

VINCENT: ...? Is something wrong?

YUFFIE: ... HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.

VINCENT: ...?

YUFFIE: OHMYGAWD THIS IS HILARIOUS. HE LEFT THE ENGAGEMENT RING IN REEVE'S OFFICE.

VINCENT: Engagement?

YUFFIE: Oh my gawd, oh my gawd. Well, if I don't get him that ring, I guess he won't get married. He really is a pain.

VINCENT: What?

*click*




YUFFIE: Okay, Cloud, where in Reeve's office did you leave it?

CLOUD: You'll do it?

YUFFIE: You owe me bigtime. BIGTIME. Like, 'Knights of the Round' bigtime.

CLOUD: Okay. Third drawer on the left in Reeve's desk. You'll probably have to pick a couple of locks.

YUFFIE: No prob'em!

*click*




So, Yuffie breaks into Reeve's office. This is where we have FIRE ESCAPES. And windows, and lock picking, and Yuffie being adorable. She manages to sneak into the WRO building, makes her way through, picks the lock on the door to Reeve's office, and grabs the ring. Piece of cake.

The problem is getting out. A guard spots her. She kicks the crap out of a bunch of guards. The guards put out a shoot-to-kill order. Yuffie takes refuge in some random person's office, hides in the desk, and calls Vincent.

YUFFIE: I HAVE A MAJOR PROBLEM.

VINCENT: ...

YUFFIE: See, you trained the security guards in the WRO HQ.

VINCENT: ...And?

YUFFIE: They've put out a STK on me!

VINCENT: What.

YUFFIE: No they really did ohmigod they're trying to actually kill me with guns I hate guns outrunning guns is fucking hard.

VINCENT: Yuffie, there isn't much I can do.

YUFFIE: No, no, wait. See. I know I can take the army of Mini-Vincents, I just need to calm down. And I'm not calming down.

VINCENT: So calm down.

YUFFIE: I CAN'T YOU HAVE TO HELP ME.

VINCENT: ... ... ... Think of what would happen if Tifa said 'no'.

YUFIE: !!!!!!!!! OHMYGAWD IF SHE SAID 'NO' AFTER THIS I WOULD HAVE TO EAT HER SPLEEN!

VINCENT: ....

YUFFIE: I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE SO I CAN EAT HER SPLEEN!


Yuffie then ties the cell phone up in her headband--- NOT TURNING IT OFF OR BREAKING THE CONNECTION-- and busts out of the office. She pulls awesome crazy moves, mostly managing to stay unharmed... But two shots hit her. They break her ribs and stay in her body. She still manages to get the hell out of dodge, go on a wild motorcycle chase through Edge, and show up at 7th Heaven in time to give Cloud TR. She then runs into the infirmary and insists that Cloud go off and do whatever it is he needs to do with TR. Reeve storms into 7th Heaven, pissed as hell. Vincent rushes in, too, because he heard Yuffie getting shot through the cell phone.

Yuffie asks if she can be Cloud's best man, since he owes her so much. Cloud says he'll think about it. Reeve and Vincent tend to Yuffie's gunshot wounds and ribs.




Cloud takes Tifa out to dinner. At the end of dinner, he states that Tifa will have the "number four on the desert menu". The thing is, as Tifa tells him, "...this restaurant's menus don't use numbers."

Cloud shrugs. He gives Tifa a tiny little metal box. Tifa opens it, to pull out a silver ring on a silver chain. The ring was her father's, apparently, and was confiscated by the Shinra and stored in Junon. Tifa freaks out, her eyes start watering.

And then a waiter brings out The Engagement Ring. They've got the box propped open on a plate, with random swirls of whipped cream and chocolate sauce.

Cloud asks Tifa if she'll marry him.

It's at this point that a random reporter is like "ZOMG WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YUFFIE KISARAGI BREAKINGI INTO THE WRO HQ?!"

Cloud has no comment. He says he has more immediate issues to think about, and asks Tifa if she feels the same way. She plants her elbow on the table, Very Obviously slides TR on her finger, and says, "Of course."




Cloud and Tifa stumble back into 7th Heaven sometime around four AM. Vincent and Yuffie are asleep on the couch. On the TV Screen, the Dracula DVD menu is playing. Tifa takes a picture or four.




Yuffie doesn't actually get to be best man. Tifa's going to ask her to be the Maid of Honor, because Yuffie is the best suited for it (I love Shera, too, but Tifa spent more time with Yuffie than with Shera, sorry~!). And, unfortunately, I have no idea who would be best man. It could be any male member of AVALANCHE, really. I'd want to say Vincent, because of the way they seemed to understand each other in AC and just general cool points, but it's entirely possible that Cloud would choose Barrett (was there from the beginning) or Cid (.....because.... uh.... Maybe not Cid?)


Unfortunately, until I have the Best Man issue worked out, I can't plot this story any further.
Tags: ff7, i'm being attacked, plotbunny, the fucking fucker!
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