i know many people dislike her, especially since they feel that she should have gone home this week; but i've really liked her throughout the competition and think she's a great dancer and after reading this, a great person. her typing annoys the heck out of me, but that's okay ;)
here's the link: http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=25760818&blogID=295483256&Mytoken=FC85033D-C381-470D-8A89C241CA6E9E3856768065
Thank you to everyone!!!!!!!!
Current mood: thankful
I really have to say thank you so so so much for the messages that you write!! This IS my myspace and I do read all of them. It actually makes my day to read them because you're all so positive and supportive. Of course I have my friends and family who are constantly calling me and emailing me to keep my spirits up but theres something about someone, a total stranger, taking the time out to write something so honest and heartfelt. Its really special!!
I can't tell you enough how much of an emotional rollercoaster being on this show has been. Ive been trying not to get too stressed out and too overwhelmed and just stay in the moment. Milk it for all its worth. At times its so hard to do that. In life you dont really hear people saying bad stuff about you. Nowadays people will be nice to your face and talk crap about you behind your back. I think people forget that your NOT going to get along with everyone!!! It just wont ever happen. There are just too many different personalities in the world and some just dont click with yours and ITS OK!!! BUUUT its crazy how you put yourself out there and go on reality tv show and some people forget that were still people. I go on the message boards to get the FREAKIN AMAZING pictures that people make (i hardly ever take pics of myself so i have a brand new collection...thank you!!!) but its tooooo hard to not let yourself read them. I doooooo know that I was not very liked on the boards at first. I cant say it didnt crush my feelings reading stuff and seeing my picture crossed out. Im human!! Who wouldnt stop breathing for a second after seeing that. BUUUUUT i do have to say it made me THAT much stronger!!!!!!!! I have grown so much through this show. It has tested my strenght, courage, patience ;), etc etc etc, so much! Its a dance competition yea.....theres a winner....and theres 19 people that dont win.....The hard part is not winning. The most challenging part is the fact that your putting yourself out there in front of millions and millions of people to judge. I CANT LIE! AND I WONT EVER BE FAKE!!! sooooooo if i dont win because i dont do certain things, or say certain things, or act a certain way then im completely ok with that!!!! I will never ever allow myself to play up or put on an act infront of the camera. In the end, i have to live with myself, and i think if i did that i would forever hate myself hahaha.
Its been so hard being in the bottom 2-3 the past ummmmm 3 weeks now hahaha. Its definately the most terrifing thing being up there. And honestly this past wednesday night i started packing my stuff up and emotionally getting myself ready to say goodbye to everything!! I was certain i was going to be the one going home. I was praying I wouldnt be sent home.....I just feel i need another week (hopefully weeks!!!!) to prove to everyone why i should be here and be on tour. I know there was a period where some people thought i shouldnt be here. My biggest advice to everyone....when doing a solo...DONT BLACK OUT IN THE MIDDLE OF IT AND TAKE YOUR JACKET OFF WHILE TRYING TO REMEMBER YOU STEPS!!! ahahhahahahahaha EVERYTHING JUST GOES DOWN HILL FROM THERE!!!!! hahaha. but seriously...after that I think i have been happy with every choice i have made while being on that stage!! Thank you for sticking by me through that nice little mess of a solo, and even if you lost faith in me hopefully i have been able to show you the past 4 weeks why i should be here. Im sooooooooooooooo freakin thankful and excited that i get another week here!!!! aaahhhhhhhhhh so amazing!!!
soooooo anywayz!!! the reason why I came on here to write this was to thank everyone so much supporting and voting for me!!! I know it takes a lot to call in as much as some people tell me they do!!!!!!!!!!!!! Trust me....I KNOW!!! I sit there too and vote hahahahaha. We all sit around and vote...and it sucks haha! I would love to meet everyone who has been there for me....and if i dont get that chance while im on tour then im atleast thankful that when the show is over i get to tell you through myspace. If i dont make it to the final 4........it wont be the end of my life!!...im definately stoked ive made it this far!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But i am going to go out there this next week and give it my best!!!!!! I dont wanna have any regrets or let anyone down including myself.
Just a little piece of my mind! i could probably write for dayz but thinking i need to go practice :)
THANK YOU AGAIN
THANK YOU AGAIN AND AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!