Many survivors struggle to ask for the help and support they need during recovery. One of the biggest contributing factors to this difficulty is having to feel vulnerable or to admit vulnerability to another person. As survivors, we have experienced horrible moments of vulnerability, and we are often hugely triggered by feeling vulnerable, even around people we feel are safe.
Vulnerability is simultaneously admitting that we need help, and therefore can feel like we are making ourselves a target for pain, and also is an admission that we need someone else to support us. Even just the thought of needing another person when you are a survivor can be a nerve-wracking experience.
One of the ways we can combat our fears of being vulnerable is to acknowledge *why* we are afraid. For in knowing why we are afraid to begin with, we can work to undo some of those associations. For many of us, it comes down to one basic thing - we've been hurt while vulnerable before - and we need to focus on admitting vulnerability on a small level first in order to re-learn how to be vulnerable and still feel relatively secure. For once we are able to really *feel* that it is okay to be vulnerable - that it makes us neither weak nor stupid nor deserving of pain - is when we can really empower ourselves in our healing.
This week's Questions are:
- Do you have a hard time being vulnerable or admitting vulnerability? When does this most often come up?
- Why are you afraid of that vulnerability?
- What small ways can you practice being vulnerable so that you can feel more secure in it?