This really doesn’t have anything to do with Surviving anything but I just felt that I need to talk about this or say something because I’m seriously worried. I just figured this would be the best place to write it out.
i just wanted to share in general an incredible sexual victory i had last night. i think it helps to celebrate and see that sex can be good sometimes...a reminder that there is hope. at any rate, i'll keep it more general in here, but i wrote a poem and stuff about it in my journal if anyone wants to read something slightly more "sexual". ( Collapse )
i have lived a life along side my sexuality. we do not speak and we each stare furtively, trying to make peace inside our suspicion. the real triumph will be to take her hand, not exact revenge. the true resolution will be the story told of the day we let it go.
I don't ever want anyone to think I am sexy ever again....
I think I equate being "sexy" to... losing my control and autonomy.
what can I do?
I was alright, I thought I was anyway until I encountered this REALLY crude and creepy man yesterday. Creepy men are always going to exsist... I just realized that I CAN NOT tolerate them at ALL yesterday. My ex-boyfriend raped me last december.
This has been a long jouney for me, and much of what I've accomplished in the last few years is reflected in what follows, which is the original monologue that I wrote to accompany my university's V-day benefit performance of The Vagina Monologues in February this year. For those of you who don't know, V-day is associated with the Vagina Monologues and Eve Ensler, and is a day dedicated to ending violence against women and girls. See www.vday.org for details.