Tags: safety


Thought stirring

Hello all, time for your weekly thought stirring question :)

For many survivors, the act of being abused in any form whether it be physically, sexually, verbally, or emotionally, destroys our ability to both trust and feel safe. Our brains, in an effort to keep us safe, often make us hypervigilant - paranoid in a sense - to fear everything as a potential perpetrator. For our brains, it is better to wrack the body with fear than to be hurt again. In our minds, it is easier to believe that we can prevent any future harm than to believe that the world is sometimes randomly and unpreventably cruel.

However, our brains will also allow us a few places of safety - for without them, we could not continue existing. For many of us, we found places we could feel in control - usually through a mix of self harm and self destruction - but for many of us, we have also stumbled across places where we just feel *safe*.

For some, it is some random corner in a friend's house, for others, it could be a place only within your own mind, while wrapped in a favorite sweatshirt or blanket, or even just in holding a special object.

So this week's question for you all is: Where have you felt safe? Was it an actual physical place, or somewhere you could only get to in your mind (or by spirit for journeying folks)? What was there? If the safe feeling wasn't a place, what was it? What did you need to do with it to feel safe (ie. was it something you wore? carried? ate? smelled?). If you have more than one, feel free to share a few of them - it's up to you as to how much you want to share, of course.

The bonus question: How can you bring reminders of that safe place into your life? Could you carry a picture of the place? Draw a picture or element of the safe place or object to have as a reminder, etc?

Collapse )
skull small

(no subject)

so i know that i wrote about how bad springfield is.. and how the guy who raped me , was spanish from springfield.

tonight, well at 4:30 i've got to go and pick up girl from Hartford. Hartford is only a very short way from my house.
and oh, hartford made number 7 on the list of most dangerous cities.
girl goes to school in hartford for medicine.

she is from my small little uber suburban upper middle class town.
we are these two little white girls.
she was prom queen of our town. and i am this smart little red head.


i don't want to go get aly by myself today.. but she asked me.. and sounded desperate.
so.. i'm a good friend and i can NEVER say no to a friend.. i mean sometimes. im a suckerr.

i asked my mom if she would go with me. to pick up girl in hartford. she said, no.
so, she sucks.
sigh,....gotta go get changed.
wish me luck, its rush hour on Friday