Tags: leaving abuser

Still Alive

You were Wild. Where are you now?

"History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be un-lived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again."

- Maya Angelou

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Apologies if I have missed any possible triggers in this cut.

Opions needed...thanks

I've come to realize that this place isn't my home. My parents, my sister, and my niece are my world...But living here is...holding me back. I live such a wreckless lifestyle, work a dead end job, and rarely go to class. I want to move somewhere brand new, start over...Begin to live the life I should be living. Make friends, go dancing and have people over to MY place. I want to get into school and find a new place to call home...Somewhere where I am forced to finish growing up.
Any advice?
Good idea bad idea?

Emotional exhuastion

It's the end of semester 1 for uni here so I'm tired. We're moving no sooner than the 8 June. I'm feeling emotionally exhausted and like I want to cry. I'm not crying though.

Last time I moved it was when I left my parents home and my emotionally abusive mum. Oh my gods, teh drama! Far less so this time but its still so stressful.

My Story

I have an insane need to share my story. I've kept quiet about it long enough, and I'm bursting in need of support; people who know what I'm going through, people who care.

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bjork painted

(no subject)

my sister and i are moving out of home. its her second time, my first. our parents are just really starting to gnaw at us. she sees a psych for depression and was also abused by the same person as me at the same time... so out of all the people in the world to move out with, im glad its her.
i think it will be a healthy move for me, being away from my folks. we're always yelling at each other and its a constant war zone here, so i really think this is a good decision.

anyone have anything they'd like to share on the topic?

I am a very confused little girl...

I've written on my boyfriend a few times here in the past.

Well I broke up with him a few days ago. He never let me do it in person (blackmail, physical force, etc), so I just ended up leaving him stranded at the airport. I guess he was there for like 14 hours before anyone got him... he called my house (I live with friends and their parents) repeatedly all evening, and we had to unplug the phones, even though they said I wasn't there, and that I didn't want to talk to them.

I guess what made me make that decision is the fact that I realized that he doesn't give a SHIT about what I want or about my feelings or well being. I gave him a few hundred dollars that week, and then he just asked for more (which I didn't have), and I realized that, finally.

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So after talking to him online for a few days (I refused to talk to him on the phone for a couple days) I decided to go meet up with him and spend the night...

So here's the story I get from him: Collapse )

So I don't know whether to believe him or not, or halfway believe him, or what. I don't know how much of his story is real and accurate, and how much isn't. I don't know if I should give him one more try or not. It's not like he hasn't had enough chances though. I just never flat-out LEFT him like that before.

FUCK, if he had only done this 6 months ago. Or even a few weeks ago! But now I've started to detatch. I don't have the same feelings for him that I did. He's damaged the relationship too much with all his bullshit.

I guess I'm looking for other peoples' opinions because I don't trust my own. Part of me wants to give him one more chance (and that's it) and part of me just wants to save myself the trouble. I don't know if he'll start up his old shit again, or if he's really changed...


wow there is so much to be said but not much time i'll start off with saying my health has gotten better. last sunday was two yr mark since i was assulted i did pretty good dealing with, by not trying to remember wat happend to me but to remember how much better my life is today an how far i've come. i just recently got out of an verbably abusive relationship where i was getting threaten to get the shit beat out of me. i haven't cut at all since skewl has started which is really surprizing. but yet today i did smash my head on the wall several time because i was pissed off really bad so i have a goose egg on my forhead. today i found out that a kid brought a gun to our skewl yesterday an know one knew about it today meaning he was walking the halls with a gun in his back pack. i have been going to skewl everyday and have been making it the hole day but this is most of wats new with me i hope everyone is doing good 

will write soon