I was physically/sexually abused and neglected as a child. As an adult I feel I've come to terms with most of it. There's just one thing I'm disturbed about - my taste for rough sex. I can't help but think that my violent past helped form my sexual identity, and as a result I "get off" on being victimized... and that disturbs me enough that I have problems climaxing with my boyfriend during "normal" lovemaking. I want to tell him to get rough with me, but I'm afraid I'm a freak for seemingly wanting to relive my past.
Does anyone have any similar experiences, or know of any good sources for information on this? Surely there have been studies done regarding sexual abuse and its effect on adult sexuality.
Thank you.
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- Current Mood
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curious
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- Tags
- bdsm