i've been working really hard to try to keep going, which is great, i'm proud of myself for that. i'm so tired. i am
so tired. but i don't feel like i belong here at all. and i don't want to do myself in, because that would hurt my family... but i don't want to be here anymore. and i have been trying to get treatment. but i have been referred, and referred, and referred, and referred, so basically i keep telling my retarded sorry tale, and everyone says help is around the corner. but i am starting to feel like around the corner is too far away.
if i didn't have my dog, i would kill myself. because i have been positive for ever, and now i just have to accept that that sometimes bad things keep happening to the same people, and i am too tired to keep going.