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_Survivors_
A safe space to share stories and ask questions
Tattoo. 
21st-Dec-2006 02:13 am
beauty
I got my huge henna-inspired side piece tattoo filled in last night. It was painful, but hey, it's a tattoo. Something happened towards the end of it though. Basically, I took on too much at once (I have no fat or muscle, I'm very tiny and the tattoo is basically across my ribs), and my body ended up freaking out on me. I cried a lot, because the pain triggered me, because it was too intense. And I don't cry, I didn't even cry at my father's funeral. But I guess I needed to let everything I've been carrying inside me out last night.

I've never really had anything that's triggered me before. I've never had flashbacks or body memories, or anything like that. I'm just confused in general as to why I had such an outburst last night. Does anyone have any advice or ideas?
Comments 
21st-Dec-2006 08:48 am (UTC)
i have a several tattoos including a chest piece, and for a while i got tattooed necause i thought it would help me somehow, i could choose to inflict pain on myself but something beautiful would be there, not a scar.
if it really effected you that badly though i would ask the artist to let you take some breaks, drink some water and move around... or just wait until you're completely ready to get tattooed again.
i hope it turned out to your liking at least :)
21st-Dec-2006 06:16 pm (UTC)
One thing, I know from when I got one of the ones on my lower back was when I was laying on the table getting it done; I would be shaking and I started triggering to myself and I don't remember a good 45 minutes of my work because I was reliving the night, but instead I was fighting my inner demons so they wouldn't let me loose control as I was getting the peice done. My buddy who was doing it did not realize what was happening because he was talking to my then boyfriend about some of his other peices as all this was happening. At one point, I had to get up and go outside to smoke a cigarette and walk around (just like what october_heart stated.) That is the only way I can explain possibly what happened. I have all intention of going for my next one around my birthday, so I'm saving up right now for my next one and thats going to mean the most to me I can already tell you. I hope it turned out beautiful :)
21st-Dec-2006 06:46 pm (UTC)
The pain of a tattoo can be really triggering when it ramps up - because it's a large amount of area that is resonating with pain. I know many tattooed people who fear getting their ribs done, as it's really painful compared to other parts of your body.

I'd second the recommendation of making sure you've eaten and had a good amount of fluids before the tattooing sessions, and ask for breaks every so often just to re-focus. Sometimes, bringing along a walkman or other music you can have in a headset can be a big help, too, as you can focus on it easier.
28th-Dec-2006 05:32 pm (UTC)
DRINK VODKA FIRST!!!!!!
28th-Dec-2006 07:25 pm (UTC)
Although it's true that Vodka is my choice alcoholic beverage, I'm not sure if that would be a safe way to go about getting a tattoo. Also, I'm 19, and that could get me in a world of trouble.
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