livinginhell5 (livinginhell5) wrote in _survivors_,

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dead to the world

dead to the world is really the only way to explain how i m right now.............. i know i'm giving up an i rally don't care theres just so much going on...... let me fill you guys in, on monday october 30 my best friend was found dead in his room he was only 16. i looked up to him like a brother always there when you needed someone to talk to. he was a popular kid, on on the football team but that didn't stop him from treating everyone nice. it didn't matter if you where slow the kid who was always picked on or the shy one he always reached out his hand for you. the day i found out i had a relapse on my cutting which i was almost at 6 months of no cutting. not a day has gone by now that i haven't wanted to cut. i've been so angry lashing out on everyone. i've givin up trying in skewl. i'm lossing myself, i bearly talk anymore either. his funeral was friday it was very hard to deal with. then sunday night my mom was admitted to the hospital beause of her back. theres just so many big things happing all at once that it's hard for me to take in. also on the hand of wanting to cut i've also have been wanting todown bottles of pills. i need help

Tags: mourning, self-injury

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