BreeZy (__dazeofnebula) wrote in _survivors_,

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Hi :) News & more.

So, I don't post in this community much because I have a hard time staying online and whatnot but due to recent events I can start to make time. My boyfriend of a year and I just broke up yesterday for the last and final time. Too much is going on with school and both of my jobs, and I was getting tired of his shit and he kept saying it was me and my mood swings and whatnot; but I didn't have control of them because of taking birth control and so much stress.

But, my story is pretty upsetting and I won't go into it because of triggering moments but I lost my best friend because of my rape. He protected me & was killed because of it. My rapist did things for so many years to scare me and it just got too enough.

Well, the other day I found a note on my car on campus and it freaked me out beyond words and my ex (now) didn't even care about my protection, he was just like what do you want me to do and all I wanted was to be held or told everything will be okay, I promise. But no, so we broke up.. and well, my best friend I think spited him and five minutes later after breaking up with me, Chris got into a car accident (my best friend died in a car accident) and was pretty banged up. I was upset and as weird as it sounds, I sat in my backyard last night looking up and told Nick so. I saw Nick in my dreams last night and he said I only wanted to protect you.

Anyhow, this upcoming Thursday. I'm getting my tattoo in memory of him and how he protected me from my rapists and whatnot. He couldn't save me then, but he's doing a damn near good job right now. IU'm looking forward too it and I think my ex or another friend is going with me for support. I'll post pictures and whatnot, I'm just really excited.
Tags: death, rape, relationships, tattoo

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