Laura (martialarts4lyf) wrote in _survivors_,

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An update

As most of you guys know, I'm finally in therapy. It's going well. I love my therapist. She's leaving though. =( She got a really good opportunity somewhere else, and she's going to take it. I'm really depressed about it. I feel like she gets me and she understand and has compassion for me. Hopefully her replacement and I will have the same kind of connection. I've been diagnosed with Post Tramatic Stress Disorder. They gave me a an anti-depressant.

I wanted to let you guys know I support all of you and I'm here for you guys and I read most of your posts. I can't read some of them because I'm still sensitive. I'm still here to support you though. Just wanted to say that. =D

My Cutting Slip-Up
I did slip up and cut yesterday. I found some razors, that I thought I had lost, accidently. I've been thinking about them. So yesterday I decided to take them out and see if there were any clean ones. There were. So... I took it out and looked at it. Then I start playing with it... looking at it, flipping it between my figures, etc. I tested on my nail to see if it was sharp... it was. I wanted to see if it would cut me like the other razor I had thown away. It did. I only ment to do it once or twice... but I have 13 small cuts on my leg. =( I felt calmer afterwards though... I didn't even realise I was stressed out. I think I'm starting to make myself numb to it. I have so much going on and I think my mind is trying to dissociate me from everything. blah.
Tags: self-injury, therapy

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