wootrang (wootrang) wrote in _survivors_,

Hi, I'm Trang.

I was adopted, and was sexually abused by five different men in four different foster homes growing up (most recently 4 years ago). Three of them are now in jail. My parents know, my brother knows (he was there), and that's it. I go to counseling once a week, and I'm feeling secure right now.

I've been dating my boyfriend for 2 years now. We've been sexually active for about 6 months. I didn't tell him about the abuse because it never came up or became a problem.

Until yesterday. He told me that rape was kind of a "turn on" to him. I don't know what to do now. I don't want to tell him because I don't want it to "turn him on".

I'm disgusted, and I feel disgusting and sick.
I don't know what to do. I guess I just needed to vent.
Tags: abuse: csa, foster care, rape: fantasy, relationships
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