A DesertRose Wilting in Florida (desertrosedark) wrote in _survivors_,
A DesertRose Wilting in Florida

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Doctor mess update

A while back I posted an entry about seeing a psychiatrist. I only really need to see a psychiatrist for medication management; I see a counselor for actual therapy. Before I had the appointment with the psychiatrist, his office sent me a questionnaire about my personal history. When I filled it out, I mentioned that my father had molested and raped me and that my ex-husband had raped me. When I went to the appointment, the doctor asked me about what my father had done, if I had resisted or if it was "just statutory rape". It took me about a day or so to get over being shocked and start getting offended and angry.

I talked to my counselor about the remark, because she is the one who referred me to him and I wanted to check with her (both as my counselor and as a mental health professional) whether she felt that remark was out of line or whether I was overreacting.

When I talked to my boyfriend (who is a paramedic and sometimes has to ask people odd questions) about the remark, he thought that the doctor had maybe just been a bit careless in his phrasing.

My counselor said she'd call the doctor and talk to him about it. I saw her yesterday and she said she'd spoken to him.

According to my counselor, the doctor was trying to figure out exactly what had happened to me. (My thought was, "Well, then, why in hell didn't he just say 'What exactly did he do to you? Can you give me a bit more detail?'" That would have been much easier for me to take than the "just statutory rape" remark. I had a psychiatrist about ten years ago ask me to write it out if I couldn't say it out loud, which was MUCH easier.) She also said that he said he didn't mean that what my dad did was anything other than gravely wrong, regardless of my reaction or lack thereof, and that he said that if I get upset, I can leave a session if need be.

In any case, I have six days' worth of my medication left, so I'm going to make at least one more appointment with this doctor so that I can at least not stop taking my med.

*crosses fingers* Here's hoping that it was just a not-so-great first session; I really don't want to have to find another doctor. It's such a pain in the arse.
Tags: abuse: incest, doctor appt
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