silence from you is like the death of a tune (richips) wrote in _survivors_,
silence from you is like the death of a tune

okay, i can't really hold it in any longer, but i also am not prepared to go to my own journal with this.

i am having a CT scan for the first time on the 18th, and then a pelvic for the first time on the 28th. all new doctor, and because of serious doctor trauma, i haven't seen a doctor for years. i had an appointment with the new doc, and he seems nice but i am not sure he is so good at preparing me, though he is aware of the sexual abuse history. i'm seeing my therapist tomorrow so hopefully he can help me sort some things out,
but i am scared now, so i needed to post now.
i thought the CT scan wouldn't be so bad, but i asked for some tips from another community and now i am not so sure.
but the pelvic has been hanging over my head and i am trying my best to be cheerful. i just hope i don't get a huge anxiety attack in the middle or something.

i hate admitting that in words, "i'm scared."

let me know if i should put this under a cut, i didn't see the need since it is general, but of course you never know, so i will be glad to comply.
Tags: anxiety, ob gyn appointment

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