Ashley (kurai_tenshi21) wrote in _survivors_,

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There is so much and I don't know where to start. Its so crazy though. And I needed to get all of this off my chest. Sorry if it is going to be long.
It all started last week, with my brother attacking my mother, and mixing drugs to get a high.
I wish things were simple in this situation. But it was him and his friends attacking my mother, and then my brother telling my mother that he was leaving and left.
That same night, I came over to protect her from herself and my brother. Because he is a threat then and right now. But that same night he attempted to break into her house, and in the morning he came by to get the remaining stuff that he had left the night before. My mother decided to go sit in the front seat of the car, and wait for my brothers return from inside the house, he returned to the car with everything in the back seat of the car. And then was trying to force my mother out of the car by any means possible. Well he couldn't. So he got into the front passenger side door, put the keys into the ignition, put his foot on the gas, and peeled off in the car and speed down the street. He hit one of my neighbors cars. My brother then backed the car up and my mom got out. But she doesn't remember the impact, or getting out of the car.
Since then my brother has been calling my mother daily, threatening her, trying to make her feel guilty about him moving out. Stuff like that.
But still he is using drugs, mixing shit to get high. Staying in abandoned apartments. And working when assigned. I don't understand how he still has a job though. But that is probably something that I will never understand.
My mom and I are still a tad freaked out by everything happening. And I am staying with her until things calm down. Which means it could be a while...
But since all this has happened, we have changed the lock, barricaded doors. Just basic things to keep us safe while we are inside the house.
i am feeling down pretty much all the time. Its just all this stuff is getting to me. Like facing my mother again after all the abuse. She seems remorseful. And sorry for what she did. Dealing with my now abusive brother. My dad is out of my life though. Which is a good thing IMO.
But this is the just of whats going on. And I just needed some people to understand. Or at least listen.
Thats all for now. Thanks for reading if anyone did.
I thank you for reading if anyone did. I just needed to vent and have someone listen.
Tags: abuse: physical, venting
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