Jessica (gesundyke) wrote in _survivors_,

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oh god.

oh god. i've been home no more than 20 minutes and they've already had an argument right behind me, yelling, and i'm two steps away from a panic attack, just clinging to what i've learned so far to keep myself from curling up and crying...

while they're arguing, i wonder if they realize the effect it has on me.

i wonder if they realize how close their child, the daughter they refuse to acknowledge they have, is to curling up in the corner of her bedroom like a scared four-year-old...

it'll pass. i know it will. i need more time to learn how to control my panic attacks when i feel one coming, instead of letting them control me. i can do this. i know i can.

until then... thank you all for listening to me.

Tags: abuse: verbal

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