versions_of_me (versions_of_me) wrote in _survivors_,
versions_of_me
versions_of_me
_survivors_

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Time to wake up...



It seems silly only because I prepared for tonight before it happened. By the time it became clear Tyler wasn't going to call, I had already rented depressing movies and ordered take out. Three days seems like such a short amount of time, yet it still brought me to tears when my mom asked if he had ditched me. To some level, it didn't bother me because I plan for this sort of thing, but none the less, being reminded that he had in fact not called...hurts.

I rented the movie "Crash" like I do from time to time...And, as always, I cried the entire movie. I warned my mom ahead of time that when a certain scene came about, and I started to cry, that she needed to not say anything, just leave it be...And, she did...at first. She kept quiet until the movie was over. I signed online and from the kitched she proceeded to say "Do you think that changed the cops life, having to save that woman?" I said "Mom, just..stop" and she replied "Well if it changed his ways, it's a good thing I mean...You are grumpy tonight" and finally I said "No mom, but that's the one scene that bothered me so can you just...not?" and that was that.

I wish Tyler had been here to hold my hand or hug me like he did the other night..*sigh*
So, tomorrow will turn out one of two ways. He will call and explain the circumstances in which why he didn't call, and will ask for a re-set date...OR, it's just...done.
Tags: abandonment issues, relationships
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