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why do I care what you think of me? [entries|friends|calendar]
not asking for attention..

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[27 Jun 2005|05:47pm]

quixoticmaiden
Tired of rating communites? Join my new community!

http://www.livejournal.com/community/plainpunchy/


x-posted
just let me cry

[01 Jun 2005|09:51pm]

littlecreep
I need new blades... no... I want them. Yes. Want.
My skin is not skin, and the blades I have are too dull.
I put bic razors on the shopping list.
just let me cry

[23 May 2005|09:29pm]

littlecreep
[ mood | sore ]

Cutting myself to ribbons. What an interesting hobby. I would say I am so dissapointed and I was doing so well... but I wasn't... and I'm not. The bleeding is still going... slow and steady. Nothing fantastic.. never is with these dull blades and cardboard skin... but then I don't have any money to go out and get new blades and no one will buy me any because they know what I will use it for... I don't see what the big deal is. It's my pain. I never asked them to care. Fuck them for caring. If that is what you call caring.

My life is taking a funny turn. I feel so abandoned and ignored. Maybe that's how it really is? I duno. I'm told it's just in my head... and maybe it is? But see in my head it used to be so much better than this... so how can it be in my head? This is more of a reality than fantasy...

But who cares.... I'm just crazy.
I'm a sad little loon, fuled with hate and resentment to those who have hurt me... to those I wish I could hurt...
Vengence would be so sweet... shame I'm so weak.

just let me cry

x-posted [17 Apr 2005|05:25pm]

takeme0ut
I almost got hit by a city bus on the freeway. I never want to drive again. I get too stressed out.
1 tear|just let me cry

[12 Mar 2005|07:01am]

takeme0ut
Fuck Im so fucking screwed.Collapse )
1 tear|just let me cry

[07 Mar 2005|09:50am]

littlecreep
Well, I haven't posted in a long time... so I thought I should.

behind a cut because I ramble a lot and might be triggeringCollapse )
1 tear|just let me cry

[13 Jan 2005|08:04pm]

takeme0ut
long and rambly and probably annoyingCollapse )
just let me cry

[02 Jan 2005|12:44pm]

littlecreep
venganceCollapse )
1 tear|just let me cry

[31 Dec 2004|07:32pm]

littlecreep
no reason at allCollapse )
just let me cry

[31 Dec 2004|02:59am]

the_natalie

 

S U R V E YCollapse )

1 tear|just let me cry

[24 Dec 2004|05:04pm]

littlecreep
Resisting the urge to cut... really am. I wana use my new blade.... new means big... I really want to. I have already given in and am cooking something to eat. God I am so weak. So very weak. I shouldn't eat.... but god I am so hungry and so down... I need some comfort... and a little something isn't so bad is it? Just a little? I hope so...


I don't know if I won't cut tonight.... I am just... so low. I will try not to.... even though that is not the best idea. Starving myself from food and cutting never gives me the results I want I really should know better. O well.... we shall see if I can hold back for today....
just let me cry

[22 Dec 2004|05:16pm]

littlecreep
[ mood | depressed ]

hurtCollapse )

just let me cry

[13 Dec 2004|06:42pm]

littlecreep
[ mood | depressed ]

serrendureCollapse )

just let me cry

[09 Dec 2004|08:41am]

littlecreep
[ mood | crushed ]

is it comforting or annoying?Collapse )

just let me cry

[06 Dec 2004|05:24pm]

larabara
name: Emily (Em)
age: 15
location: Maryland
have you ever cut? Yes.
have you ever thought about suicide? A little bit..but never really considered it.
why did you join this community? I'm trying to quit..and I thought it'd help if I had a few more people to talk about cutting with.. to help me stop.
random quote: Can't think of any, heh.
1 tear|just let me cry

Eating Disorders Research [02 Dec 2004|05:37pm]
planktonday
All:
Hey everyone, Id like to introduce myself. My name is Lindsay and Im 22, a graduate from SUNY Fredonia. I will be going on to grad school in Fall 2005 and in the meantime I want to do some research. I will be going on to school for social work to study eating disorders. I am in the very early stages of putting together a lengthy survey that I plan to turn into a book (before I return to school).
This is where all of you come in. I would like to know if any of you would be interested in taking a survey such as this. It would be completely confidential (you would give only me personal info. for my record-keeping). This is going to be looked over by a lawyer before I send it out, so it will be very legit. The questions range from demographics (name, age, sex etc.)- personal data such as names would not be disclosed, to questions about your personal struggle, media influence, mental health background etc. I believe I am qualified to do research like this because I have struggled with an eating disorder for years, I feel like I have a non-judgemental outlook and the ability to ask questions that maybe haven't been asked before.
This is a rather non-personal email (sorry) that I intend to send to as many of these eating disorder based livejournal groups as possible. That is because I need help from all of YOU. If you are interested- email me
ED_Research@hotmail.com
Please keep in mind that I am in the beginning stages and although I want to move the processes along quickly, it may take time before I am able to send the finalized survey out. If you email me, I will try my best to respond in a timely fashion and answer any questions you may have.
Thank you so much, Lindsay
just let me cry

[02 Dec 2004|11:14am]

littlecreep
dizzy dumCollapse )
just let me cry

[01 Dec 2004|11:17am]

littlecreep
so sad... to badCollapse )
just let me cry

[30 Nov 2004|09:47am]

littlecreep
i'm sorry...Collapse )
just let me cry

[28 Nov 2004|07:32pm]

littlecreep
I have decided to try and quit smoking. I have none left, I will not buy anymore... there is none to smoke yet my flat mates are still smoking. Not being to helpful. Just ignoring me. I feel really alone on this but like that really matters right? So....I'm exreamly stressed.... and god How I want to cut. I can just imagine it. After mny shower.... drown myself in blood. Drip Drip.... making a pool around me. I really want to, I have to. I can get rid of both. It's so hard. I can feel the panic rising. I'm sitting here with short sleves on looking at what I did lasts night, the larg gashes and bruises down my arms. Purple and red and yellow as you can still see inside myself. It's.... not enough. Never enough.
just let me cry

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