December

Nuke 'em. Let's nuke the bastards!

This morning, for any number of reasons, I ate breakfast at McDonald's. There really not a lot of good options arouind where I work and it was there and I just figured "What the Hell?"

It wasn't until after I'd ordered my food and was seated, slicing my suasage and spreading de butter on nde pancakes, that I noticed that they were playing XMAS music. Specifically, they had it on KOIT...which at this time of year plays XMAS music 24 hours a day, every day, until just a little after New Year's...

...which is really wrong seeing as it's not even Thanksgiving yet!

Anybody know a good hacker that can bust through the systems at NORAD or something equally stockpiled. I say we laser lock every single outlet of the Golden Arches and blow them all to kindgom come!!
  • Current Mood
    bitchy bitchy
applexcore

Ronald Dead?

Ronald McDonald Dead, at 38
1:43 A.M. March 20th, 1997
Alex Sandell

In a shocking press release, issued today from McCholesterol Hospital, located in After-Effect, a quaint suburb of McDonald Land, it was announced that the famous Ronald McDonald passed away due to coronary heart failure at 6:43 P.M., McPacific Time. Mr. McDonald's primary physician, Dr. McNugget told the Juicy Cerebellum "I cannot believe he lasted this long. I've never seen arteries clogged quite as badly, before."

For the past year, Ronald's friends and family have been trying to put him on a more healthy diet. "Ronald wouldn't budge an inch. He was convinced the food his namesake restaurant served was the healthiest around, contradictory to all the reports," Ronald's brother, Rafiki was quoted as saying, in this morning's edition of the New York Times, only hours before Ronald's death. "Ronald DID have a wide variety of meals but, they all started with a Mc," said Ronald's mother, McHillary McDonald.

Mayor McCheese refused to comment on the current state of McDonald Land but, according to reports, gigantic riots, led by the Hamburgler, have broken out, similar to those in California, during the Rodney King incident. The same source has informed the Juicy Cerebellum that Burger King is going to lend a hand to their main competition, by sending in troops of lame oldies tunes, last used on their Whopper and breakfast biscuit commercials.

The Juicy Cerebellum will keep it's readers informed, as new information arises. For now, we have to mourn with the rest of the country over this tragic and, unforeseen, loss. Ronald's dying words are said to be "I lied."

No further information has been released at this time.

Juicy Cerebellum Press Syndicate


Our community is dead, that's for sure. I just hope Mr McDonald is okay, and this is all a hoax.

(no subject)

I know this isn't a good thing to do but i'm flaunting my myspace here.

www.myspace.com/pieforthesoul/

i'm pretty much just trying to beat my friend dave in profile views. Check it out, you might find a picture you like *tee hee!*

but to make it relevant to the community-

You know how everyone says Jesus is black? Personally I think Ronald is black. How could you tell with all that pasty white makeup and wig on? and he never shows an inch of skin! And he works at McDonalds! And has giant black people lips! And he smacks his hoes around!

that last one is based purely on conjecture.

Jake

(no subject)

Our own deity, Ronald, has been promoted commercially to the level where even society-hating punx have decided he is worth mocking. Mitch Clem has provided us with this stunning portrait of the Messiah in his Second Coming.

  • Current Music
    bada ba ba baaa

Would I come as before.

Can you say dead community?


PROMOTE LIKE FUCK YOU ARSEHOLES.









Try adding a few more 'Interests' to the Userinfo mate.
e.g. 'McDonalds'
  • Current Music
    Coheed & Cambria - The Crowing

Something for nothing.

Ronald McDonald


Ronald was first introduced in 1963. Ever since clown's astounding powers have worked their magic. He helped make McDonald's the most dominant fast-food chain on the planet.

He also exemplifies one of the most important qualities of an effective commercial character: He doesn't sell for McDonald's, he is McDonald's.



The easiest things are so hard.Collapse )

What a poser and three quarters?
Don't say i'm not good to you.


Gyming it up big time.
  • Current Music
    The Bravery - Unconditional