May 10th, 2006

So far....

I miss him.

I don't know why today has been so bad. Probably because we haven't talked at all today and I guess I'm just used to talking to him every day at the same time.

His comp is down, and that's why.

I just love him so much, and this is such a depressing hour.

~Sarah and Nick forever~
  • Current Music
    Spring, Rammstein

Apologies

So, Chris forgave me...

Right up until Saturday, it seems.

He stopped calling me, kept saying that he was "busy", and then he called me back today after I left a message saying that I was going to stop trying until he decided he wanted to call me. He told me that he's been "thinking about some stuff", and then he said he couldn't talk to me about it.

Then he concluded that it was about the "us" thing.

I stood through the first year of our relationship, which was very, very emotionally and psychologically abusive on his end; I ended it... God, I don't know how many times, now. Then, after he dumped me after I took him back after a LONG recess, I took him back, again.

Now we're here, where he's not willing to forgive me for one mistake. :(

Basically, the reason why I was writing here is this: I need help. I don't know a lot of English or popular music, but I'd like to make him up a CD of songs that are basically 'I'm sorry' and 'please believe in me again' songs. I forgave him so many times, and I would just...

Really, really like it.

If he could find it in his heart to forgive me. I'm sending him other things, but... Yeah.

Any suggestions?
  • Current Music
    Panic! At the Disco - Lying is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have.