March 7th, 2006

Come What May

I had the most amazing conversation with the boyfriend last night.

Everything started when I tried to message him during school, and since I'm on my phone, things got a little wonky with the replies.

I just got frustrated and gave up. He went and took a nap until about 1 AM his time.

During the time he was sleeping, I wrote him an email. It contained me ranting about how I felt like an inconvenience in his life, while simulaneously complaining that the ticket prices to Scotland were outrageous, and that I could never afford them.

So in sum, I felt terrible.

Then he finally got back online, and we started talking. He said the most amazing things, I literally started to cry.

Nobody's ever told me they loved me WITHOUT CONDITIONS before. I mean, guys have told me they loved me, but it was more like, "I love you but...." or "I love you if....."

But when I told him that I used to cut, and that I had scars, he replied, "I have scars too. They're a part of you, I love them."

It's amazing to be loved for things you've done wrong, despite things you've done wrong.

He pretty much told me that I'm the best girlfriend ever. Then he did the sweetest thing.

He sent me lyrics to a song:

If you could have taught me anything
You would have found what love is.
IF you could have taught me what was on your mind,
I could have shown you the way.
Someday...I will be before you.
Have you ever thought about that time?
I never imagined the pictures of that night
For now I will try to live for you
And for...
I will try to live
Try to live the love, the dreams,
And finally, the tears.

So now we have an official song: Tears by Dahlia.

I love how we could take such a morbid song and turn it into a love song.

I love him so much.

He sent me pics, two of them. One was of his tattoo (sigil of Satan on his shoulder), and the other is of him decked out in goth gear. Yum!

Seriously. I never thought you could love someone more and more each day.
  • Current Music
    Tears, Dahlia

la la la MOD post!


I know I'm being bad and haven't really talked to Jill about this or anything but I was curious if you have AIM screen names if you'd be willing to comment with them. I want them for a few reasons, the first of which is so I can get feedback on the community and also to unite the community. Now, out of all the online love communities I'm in, this one is actually the most active which makes me really proud, but I want to develop relationships with you guys as well. We're great with this, but just in the future and everything else. I also want these anyone - myself or anyone else - can come in contact with specific people. This makes it easier for two reasons. Firstly, if you're breaking a rule sometimes it's easier to confront you over IM and it can be less dramatizing as well. Also, if I or someone else posted a problem or idea and got feedback on it and want to further discuss it with the member who posted the comment (does that even make sense?) we can IM them and have a deeper conversation than one through comments.

So if you care to share them (no obligation) please do :) MSN, ICQ, and Yahoo messengers are alright as well, just specify.

My AIM sn is PrincessSarri, and my AOL sn is xKonstantine777.