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help please!!

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Mar. 28th, 2006 | 08:20 pm
posted by: suzbsbkurtz in _nowheretoturn_

(my boyfriend is writing this...)

I'm trying to figure out what kind of chemical imbalance I have. When I was young, I was the short weird kid and got picked on a loooooot. A whole lot. Especially grades 1-6 when I was in a Catholic school and literally had not one friend. I had a mini-breakdown early last year (age 22) and was put on prozac for about 9 months to fight anxiety and depression. I've since gone off it (no insurance, plus side effect) and don't have symptoms as bad. When I was on prozac, I gained perspective and clarity in emotions and reactions. Since I've been off it, I get a bit frantic now and then. I'm moderately hypoglycemic for starters---when I get hungry, I become a very irrational and irritable person and can't control my reactions to something that bothers me. When I'm not hungry, I still have fits of...something...every now and then. Anxiety is always present because I'm stressed out to the limits because of money problems (too much credit card debt, student loans, low-paying job, high rent, car maintenance). Every now and then, if something is said that I really shouldn't take personally or overreact to, it feels like I'm being made fun of and I get a bit frantic. I don't really have too much in the way of actual everything-is-awful, no hope in sight depression symptoms, but it does come around once in a blue moon. I can't afford health insurance (or really, anything) right now but know that at some point in time a trip a psychiatrist is necessary. Everything that was wrong with how I was became startlingly clear as being unnecessary when I was on prozac and I know I don't have to put up with being this way, but I want to know exactly what the cause (diagnosis) is. Thanks.

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Comments {2}


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from: tasterainbows
date: Mar. 29th, 2006 05:36 pm (UTC)

Firstly, welcome the community.

Secondly... why is your boyfriend typing for you?

Thirdly... unfortunately, no one here is qualified to give you a diagnosis. If you feel that you need professional help, I urge you to get it at the earliest possible time. If insurance and money are an issue, you can usually find low-cost mental health services by contacting your county Department of Social Services or the Department of Mental Health. The numbers should be listed in your phone book. Alternatively, if you are enrolled in school, every school has some sort of counseling department and they can help you out.

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from: clonnie
date: Feb. 9th, 2008 11:50 am (UTC)

Over 3 years ago I dropped into a black hole – four months of absolute terror. I wanted to end my life, but somehow [Holy Spirit], I reached out to a friend who took me to hospital. I had three visits [hospital] in four months – I actually thought I was in hell.

I imagine I was going through some sort of metamorphosis [mental, physical & spiritual]. I had been seeing a therapist [1994] on a regular basis (Family of Origin & EMDR), up until this point in time. I actually thought I would be locked away – but the hospital staffs were very supportive [I had no control over my process]. I was released from hospital 16th September 2004, but my fear, pain & shame had only subsided a little.

I remember this particular morning waking up [home] & my process would start up again [fear, pain, & shame]. No one could help me, not even my therapist [I was terrified]. I asked Jesus Christ to have mercy on me & forgive me my sins. Slowly, all my fear has dissipated & I believe Jesus delivered me from my “psychological prison.”

I am a practicing Catholic & the Holy Spirit is my friend & strength; every day since then has been a joy & blessing. I deserve to go to hell for the life I have led, but Jesus through His sacrifice on the cross, delivered me from my inequities. John 3: 8, John 15: 26, are verses I can relate to, organically.

He's a real person who is with me all the time. I have so much joy & peace in my life to day - after a childhood spent in orphanages. God loves me so much. Fear, pain & guilt are no longer my constant companions. I just wanted to share my experience with you (Luke 8: 16-17).

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