Dieses Mittel nichts (xprovemewrongx) wrote in _letterstoyou_,
Dieses Mittel nichts

dear casie,
i find myself trapped in a permenate state of delusion. and i feel that my confusion is evident now more than ever. i no longer know what to think or feel or say. life just feels like some big game, im being forced to play. and this non- existent god seems to be the rule marker, and seems to laugh at me whenever i make a wrong move. happiness is the most important thing to me, you know that. but i haven't the slighest idea what i need to make myself feel okay. all i want is to feel content with myself and my life, and ive been bafiled on how to do feel this way for some time now. since about as long as i can remember. my eyes cant decide if im living in a dream or in reality. sometimes, i wish i could sleep forever.. because it's the only time that one is totally unaware of their own existence.
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