October 29th, 2007

(no subject)

dear you,
i don't feel like i'm the most important person in your life anymore. idk if i still am, i hope so. &i really hope you consider me your best friend because if our friendship is just a lie than i really don't know what's real anymore. you're the only person i know i'm gonna be close with for the rest of my life. nothing can change that for me, but i'm scared that something can change it for you. i just feel like you like me so much less than you used to because now you're like "best friends" with her after like a month of knowing her. i'm really jealous of her because you're always giving her hugs and telling her how much you love her and how cute she is and stuff. you used to be like that with me too, but it's just so much less now. idk if you feel awkward because of everything, but if you do please don't. because i know we're just best friends and i don't consider you anything more than that.. i don't want you to feel like you can't act the same around me because we promised each other that we'd always act completely ourselves together, because we were always the only people we could be like that around. i miss you &it's just been bothering me. you never talk to me about anything that you feel anymore, and i miss it so much. you can always talk to me no matter what. i'll always be here for you and i really don't want us to ever grow apart because you mean the world to me and no one has ever connected with me as well as you do. i really feel like we're like sisters. like we can fight a million times but they never last more than like an hour and we always end up realizing that one of us is just being stupid and it isn't worth it. it isn'ttt worth it because our friendship means way more than any other ones, it's a real one &we've been through so much together. i really think we need each other, because we're a part of each other. i just don't want this to ever change. you're the only thing in my life that i know for sure is real, i know i need you in my life and i'd be so scared to ever tell you any of this because you'd probably just think it was annoying that i always talk about how you're my best friend. but you really are.. you don't know how much you mean to me.

dear you,
you really get on my fucking nerves. i can't stand you. you think everything revolves around you and you always have to be everyones favorite and get everything your way. i can't take it anymore. you drive me crazy.

dear you,
i wanna be closer with you. we have SO much in common &we've been through so much of the same shit. you're one of my favorite people.