June 2nd, 2006

(no subject)

you know i'll always come over to you when you're alone whether you want me to or not. you looked so sad today. you wouldn't tell me why. and that worries me. that you won't tell me makes it scarier. maybe you weren't even sad. maybe you just looked it. but can you look it and not feel it, when you're not acting. but you're always acting. you're always aware. i really hope i had nothing to do with making you sad. my modest side knows it probably isn't because you don't dwell on me so much as far as i know. but my insecure side..that's not so modest.

you know i love you.
i don't know exactly what kind of love. but i know it's some deep form. be it friend, be it more. but it'd be weird to tell you. how sad is that. that you can tell your friends that all the time because it's not such a raw love. but if it's something, even slightly more than just a general friendship love, then you can't because it makes things awkward.

why didn't you even reply to my text? that's pretty rude. and that Again you decide to hang out with gwen instead. it makes me angry and hurt. a lot of both. maybe you hadn't read my text then. but you must have by now. i want to be able to confront you about it.

something about the way you were yesterday made me feel like you were waiting for me to say something. maybe that's just the false hope talking.

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