February 4th, 2006

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(no subject)

As Always, Dear You

This is my final letter to you, I promise. I promise you and more importantly, I promise myself. I kept reliving those days with you. Those days when it was only you that could make me smile. Those days when it was only you that I wanted to be with. After it was all over, I still wanted it, I still felt I needed it, but not anymore, I know the truth. It wasn't you who was the only one that could make me smile, it was you that made me cry. It wasn't you that I wanted to be with, it was I hoped you'd be. I made you into someone you couldn't be, someone you didn't want to be. I needed someone that cared, you only cared when it was convenient for you. For three years I clung on to hope. I clung onto this dream that one day you would realize that I really was your one true love. Eachtime I tried to move on you would come back into my life saying the words I wanted to here, but they were all lies weren't they? I opened up completely to you and you let me down again. I didn't think my heart would ever heal, but it has.
I have met someone who loves me, truly loves me. I don't have to wonder or hope if he does, I know he does. I know it everytime he kisses me and everytime he holds my hand. I can feel it.
But this letter is not to talk about him or even about how you hurt me, it's to thank you. Thank you for breaking my heart over and over again. Thank you for not treating me the way I deserved to be treated. Because if you hadn't treated me that way, I wouldn't appreciate the love that I have now as much. I hope you find happiness someday, the same happiness I have found now.
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