May 18th, 2005



Dear Friends,

I'm sorry for everything, really. And maybe removing myself from your lives was wrong...maybe I'll regret it in the months to come, but for now it seems right. As I wrote to him, this space will allow us ALL to heal our hurt feelings...and maybe one day we'll be friends again. Maybe one day you guys will be able to trust me again. But right now, this is what we all need.

And to a certain one of you, I read that you had cried. Don't waste your tears. Don't think of this as an ending...think of it as a new beginning...or a pause in our friendship until I'm a person who deserves you guys. That's a better way to do it. And if it helps at all, I haven't cried yet...and I don't plan to.

I wish you all the best of luck in everything you endeavor. And I will always, always love you guys, always remember our laughter, our special times, and everything we've learned from each other. You guys are the greatest friends I've ever had. The year that I spent with you guys has been the best year that I've had until this point.

I leave with none but the fondest memories of you guys, and I hope once you all get past the pain that I've caused, that you can remember me in the same light.

Goodbye (for now),
  • Current Music
    "Come Down"~Bush

pt.1 <3

Dear you,
Please forgive me for everything Ive done wrong. Ive made a huge mistake and I know it hurt you. I didnt relize what I had till it was gone. I fell in love with you but I never had the guts to tell you. Now everytime I see you with someone else it fills me up with anger and disapointment to myself. Why did I do something so stupid and mess things up? Have I sunk so deep into only my feelings that I couldnt see how bad I hurt you. I was only thinking of myself at the time and that was real stupid of me. The one night you came over a few nights ago filled me in on what I was missing. Chris Ive fallen back in love with you. I know this sounds crazy but its true. When you dated Heather I acted like I didnt care but I did in a way but I kept it to myself cause I didnt want to screw things up with you and her. Im sorry. <3 Sincerly,
  • Current Mood
    confused confused

(no subject)

god i miss you,
and "I'm writing to you
Not to tell you, that I still hate you
Just to ask you how you feel
And how we fell apart

Are you happy out there in this great wide world?
Do you think about me?

When you lay your head down how do you sleep at night?
Do you even wonder if I'm all right?

It's been a long hard road without you by my side"

i know you probably dont want anything to do with me but i bought part of your birthday present. i hope you like it. actually i hope you accept it. i feel so rotten with out you. and i've heard news that your sick. im terribly sorry and i do hope you feel better. because i love you. so feel better.
if only i could take everything wrong back. if only we haddent split apart. "if only, if only. its always if only."
  • Current Music
    -jewel- foolish games-

(no subject)

Dear this community,

you guys are very supportive and nice! I like y'all!

+ Alida

Dear thought,
I wonder if ____________ thinks I'm stupid. Probably not, ________ knows I know, haha.

later, Alida

Dear May Project,
you are so freaking boring at times, haha. Oh well...I hope not too many people call the department tomorrow because I have to answer the phone and I hate phones.

+ ALida

(no subject)

Dear Boy,

I don't want anymore mixed signals.
I don't want short hugs that make me have second thoughts.
I don't want to think of you so much.
I don't want to fall so hard so fast.
I don't want to associate so many songs with you.
I don't want you to think of me like you do other girls.
I don't want something that won't last.
I don't want you to pretend you're coming over to talk to your other friends when all you do is talk to me, everyone notices.

I do want for you to be honest with me.
I do want to hang out with you everyday.
I do want you to call me just to hear my voice.
I do want me to mean just as much to you.
I do want to fall asleep next to you.
I do want to have fun just talking about random things.
I do want to listen to your voice when you sing me songs.
I do want someone who matters.


(no subject)

Dear _letterstoyou_ communtity,

Thank you for keeping me from saying all the things that come across my mind. They would not improve any current situations I have with Alex or anyone else for that matter. You are the greatest therapy in the world.

Much Love,