April 24th, 2005

I rock.

I don't know how I deal with you...

Dear Alex,

I really don't understand the way you work. First off, you call my house Thursday, while I'm hanging out w/ Brian, who I haven't hung out with since JANUARY, and you ask him to ditch me to hang out with you!? You guys just hung out like..Monday. And this is my BEST FRIEND, someone who I've been having issues with lately, and you ask him, no, TELL him, to ditch me. Then you tell me that you're coming over. Didn't even ask if it was okay, that you were just going to come over. You know that my parents hate you. And then you badmouth me, and how I play the guitar. I understand that I'm new at this, and I'm not that good. But you have NO right saying that, when you fucking SUCK at playing the drums. All you know how to play is the "Rim Job" song, and you can't even play THAT right.
Oh, and tonight, when you called, and had the guts to tell me that I'm giving you MY wristband, that I bought for me, because.."you're the leader of our 'gang' and you'll kick me out if i don't give it to you" Wow. You're a fucking idiot. First of all, don't fucking tell me what to do. I hate that, and you know it. Second, you're an asshole, thinking that you can get away with talking about me to Brian ALLLL the time. Oh, trust me, he's trying to cover your ass. But, don't forget, I read faces, voices, and emotion VERY well, and I know when someone is lying. So when I asked him if you talked about me like that all the time, and he goes..."No," I can tell that he's lying.
So, for someone who claims that I am their best friend, you have a hell of a way of proving it. You only talk to me when you want something. And like..Idk. There's something about you that really GETS to me. You never take anything seriously. And, Brian has done soo much more shit to me than you have. But you know what? We have that kind of relationship where it doesn't bother us. I mean, I've gone to sleep crying because of him, and I can guarantee he has too. But we have that connection that you and I will never have.
I can honestly say, that I hate you now. The past two and a half, almost 3 years were such a waste. All the hell you've put me through, and all the shit that I've taken. I should've listened to everyone else when they said that you were bad news. But they didn't understand..they didn't know you like I did. But now I see who you are. And I don't like it.

Alex..we can't be friends anymore.
l o v e

(no subject)

dear love life,
you suck, when am i going to meet that special someone?
i meet a boy at the movies last night- i wonder how things will go with that?
help me out, i need someone soon....
<3, Monique

dear family,
you guys can be so odd at times
i mean my mom wants to buy a harley!
she already got her motorcycle permit
no one wants her to get one though
we dont want her to get hurt
so please help her realize that we love her
and that we dont want her hurt if she gets in a accident
motorcyles are dangerous....
<3, Monique

dear life,
get more intresting
<3, Monique
  • Current Mood
    blah blah

(no subject)

Dear Mel,

I dont know where to start. I cannot stand you at all, i really wish you'd just disappear from this world. I have no an idea how i was ever your friend in the first place. you and your LJ entries about God and how you say you are the only christian in your grade really bugs me. Im not labeling myself a Christian, but you make it seem like christians go to church and stuff, and i dont. But i still believe. I dont need you and your church to help me believe any stronger. You cant go off asumeing random people arent going to heaven just because you havent seen them at YOUR church. I really thought christians didnt judge people, or atleats tried not to, but it seems as if thats all you do, is assume about people and judge them. It's nuts. I wish you'd just LEAVE this town and that id never have to see you again. I cant stand seeing you around MY FRIENDS! trying to win them away from me. Well heres news for you! THEY DONT ALWAYS TALK BEAUTIFUL ABOUT YOU! Your nothing special to me or anyone else in this world. It's people like you that make me want to go mad. I cannot stand you and your little philosophy on life, because it sucks ASS hole. Thats right i just SWORE, i said a SWEAR word. Am i going to Hell Mel? huh am i going to hell? NO, God still loves me no matter what i do, no matter what mistake i do.. God doesnt hate anyone. SO FUCK OFF YOU FAT BITCH!

  • Current Mood
    refreshed refreshed

boys boys boys

dear (guess who?),

i love you so much, just when i think things cant get any better THEY DO! all my life things have gone wrong and than you come along and now i cant name one thing wrong in my life. you make me so happy, i could sing and skip all day. there was 2 things i never believed in forever and never well now i definetly believe in forever! ohh you can just make my world go 'round!!!!! i dont think i have ever felt this way and i want to spend every second of every minute with you because of many reasons like around you is the only time i dont have to pretend to smile and you can make me laugh anytime and ooo i just love you so much
your baby
  • Current Music
    my only enemy *american hi-fi*

(no subject)

Dear you,
I'm such a tragedy. I know I am, no need to let me know.'I love you' is such a scary line, isn't it? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to fall in love with you. I'm sorry for scaring you. I know you love me in a little sister manner, but my death isn't something you should be worried about. Everyone would be better off without me. Worse than that, I'm just. fucking. like. jackie.
I hurt people. like she does. I may not do it on purpose, but the end result is still the same and that's what counts. In the end, that's all you've got left, so maybe the intent doesn't really matter anyway. That's just my opinion though, and when did my opinion matter? I love you so much...I know I'm just your little sister, but I'm so scared of doing something and hurting you, just like in the nightmares...
If, after all of this, I can't control myself anymore and I turn up dead, there's a few things I want you to know. The first being that I'm more sorry than you can know for being that selfish. The second being that I love you and I can't change it no matter how hard I try. The third being that I will hate her for what she did to you until my one last gasping breath. The fourth thing being that I'm just sorry in general, about everything.
the girl that's never going to be anything but your little sister. a.k.a., your Lizzy.

lotsa letter i just needed 2 write

dear miss n
you are a lesbian hobbit with no life
fuck off
your a crapp teacher


dear life
please skipp 2 wednesday afternoon and then to friday
friday is good
i will have credit, no assignments or tests and no braces
but i dont wanna have the days inbetween now a friday
just make 2day friday

dear thumb
i am rilly sorri
i dont mean to chew your whole nail off
im just on one of those moods
and if u would plz stop hurting
that would be much appricated

dear star
starlight, star bright,
first star i see 2nite
i wish i may i wish i mite
b the one he wishes for 2nite

dear world
just b nice
make me happi