March 7th, 2005

(no subject)

just let me hold you once more. kiss me one last time. let me feel like the world is in my hands again. and take all my fears away for just one more day.

i love you more then you'll ever know.

(no subject)

dear josh,

i hate you.

dear anouck,

i hate you.

dear self,

i hate you.

why dont you just fucking leave them alone? what the fuck did they ever do to you? i know your trying to help them get together so THEY can be happy. but what then? your just making it worse for yourself.. please.. just leave them alone. they dont deserve to be hassled and abused. just leave them alone. keep everything to yourself and pretend like this isnt hurting you. c'mon, you a very good liar.. remember? just please please please leave them alone. they deserve to be happy. they deserve each other. so back off you selfish piece of shit. leave them the fuck alone. if you do.. maybe i will give you a reward.. maybe i will let you eat again. soon.. just leave them alone.. please..

♥ me..
  • Current Music
    hawthorne heights

(no subject)

Dear Y_____,

I've spent the day listening to power ballads and soppy songs, thanks to you. If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times, you are the only thing that keeps me going. I know it hasn't been perfect, but what relationship is?

I'm tired of sharing you. I'm tired of spending every weekend with everyone but you. I understand that you like to socialize and so do I. But I don't spend 5 days a week anticpating a weekend that will be spent staying out with your friends until 5am watching you get drunk and feeling as though I'm a wallflower.

Remember the night we spent at Cronulla? All we did was talk and it was the most beautiful thing that has ever happened to me. Or the night at Coogee where we just lay on the beach giggling and acting like idiots? Since when does it take another 85734 people to make you happy? I make you happy, you told me that and I believe you.

Y, I want my boyfriend back. I know I'm not perfect either, but if I don't give up on you, please don't give up on me. You're all I want.

Love Loz.
  • Current Mood
    confused confused

(no subject)

Dear Travis,

Out of all the people I know, you are definitely the sweetest, generous, and the most caring. Even if something terrible happens to you, you still try and make everybody feel better. Which is why I think you are absolutely incredible, for dealing with your dad's passing the way you are. I know you are upset, and I know you're sad, but I just want to let you know that I love you so much. And I don’t understand why this had to happen to you. You didn't deserve this tragedy in your life. You are just too sweet and nice to have this happen to you. You have never said anything mean to anybody, and you never talked badly about anybody. Every time we see each other in math we talk to each other and give each other hugs because we don’t have 2nd hour together. But I do because I need to see my Travis. I always come to you to make my day better. So, I’m writing this letter to you, because I couldn’t stop thinking about you all day. I cried and cried knowing that such an amazing person was going through all this pain. Travis, I am so sorry, and I love you so much. I'll be thinking about you. <3

Just remember to smile, because I don’t know if you know this. But every time you do, you make everyone’s days so much better, especially mine. J

I love you,
Credit: &lt;lj user=&quot;enchantastar&quot;&gt;

(no subject)


Thanks for lying. I know it's over and done with now, but really, thanks. After I actually gave you the letter that was hard enough for me to even write in a community like this... You asked out Britt. Thanks. You weren't ready to go out with me, but I fucked up once and you're ready for her. Thanks a lot, buddy. Thanks for letting me know I was just a sweet piece of ass. But, you know what? I'm over you. I have someone better. But really. Thanks for teaching my a lesson about people, and about trust.

Sincerely and surprisingly without hostility,
dps - you and me

(no subject)

I thought about you today. I don't know why. Maybe it was because I saw a car just like your junker pass me on the road and for an instant there maybe I even thought it might be you. When was the last time I saw you? I know for sure the last time we were face-to-face was June 26th. You never commented to me on my speech, and that bothered me for weeks after. I still wonder what you thought of it..... Are you still with her? March 1 would have been your 3 and 1/2 year anniversary. The two of us met a short time after you'd been with her for a year. Wow. Time sure does fly, doesn't it? Does she still hate me? I saw her over the summer. I was driving on your road, on my way to work.. Are you two going to get married someday? How is your brother? I know I never officially met him, but I feel like I knew him just the same..... I don't think I miss you, but I think that if I saw you again, I would miss you more than ever..... I wish we were still friends. I sure could appreciate having you around right now.

Maybe I'll see you around this summer..
Forever a part of you,

(no subject)

Dear Dave,

I still love you, like I said I always would and will forever. But I'm over us ever being anything more than friends. I don't love you in a romantic way, or rather I do, but it is too great a love to ever risk. I'm glad we're back to being as close as we were over the summer. I love you, and I love that I'm one of two people who have ever seen you cry.

Dear Shane,

Don't you dare ever call me again. You're lucky I didn't decide to pick up because I would not have been talking. I WOULD HAVE BEEN FUCKING SCREAMING. How dare you call me expecting that a few months would let me cool off. You're lucky I was ever speaking to you after the shit you pulled in December and January, let alone what you pulled a few months ago. I can never trust a word out of your mouth again, and I hope you find a girl who is dumb enough to fall for your lies and you psychological ways of thinking that hurting her will make things easier.


Love always, Meghan.
Fuck you, Meghan.

(no subject)

Dear Self....

So today was day 1 of softball tryouts... how did you do? you did were throwing pretty good and your running times werent terrible...Your catching need to do better tomorrow...lock you damn glove around the ball...dive for the ball, show them what your made them that you CAN do this because you can...if you work your ass off tomorrow, you can at least make C team...just try babe, right now so mcuh depends on if you make it or just want to play? prove faster, throw straighter, catch better....puch yourself like you never have before...have some confindence....forget all the bruises and pulled muscles and pull yourself up for can do did okay WILL do better tomorrow

  • Current Music
    "So Far Away" by Crossfade
i&#39;m not...

(no subject)

your just a tease
sent from hell to release me
but i already knew
by the way that you
i wonder if you dream at night
i wonder if you like awake
and if i ever crossed your mind
does it bother you i never ask?
for acceptance
your repentance
your enamored by your own greed
but even if you wanted me
it'd all be just another game
like the other day when
you asked me if i needed you
i wanted to open my mouth
but all i could say
was ask the same
and you
you wish that i would just give in
i wish that you would understand
how much
you confuse me
you abuse me
you refuse me
and still i
stand up and breathe
dust myself off
and on rare occasion
i try to smile
i feel a surge of power in your words
feel the length between breaths
pull myself away and then
that i'm not smiling on the inside.
Keeping quiet is hard.

Come back already.

Dear boy I love so much,

Why did you do that?
I hate not seeing you everyday like I used to.

The girl who hasn't told you her true feelings

Everything remindes me of you.
And I miss you more everyday.
  • Current Music
    Brand New - Jude Law And A Semester Abroad

It's a fact.

Dear boys,

You all suck. I mean seriously, all of you do.
Right when we lovely girls think we've found a nice boy, you turn around and kill us.

God damn you all.
God damn you and your killing charm.
  • Current Mood
    gloomy gloomy
my smile

(no subject)

You and you,

You can not. Can not. CAN NOT. Do this to me. NO! I will not allow it!!

You break my heart every single day that I don't hear from you. Fucks me up. And yes, exactly when I forget, you come back into my life. To make ME and mess. Just when I think I'm okay, you come and FLIP FLOP everything that I have established. Don't you have compassion? Don't you care about me?

Don't give me those lousy excuses. You couldn't sent an email, a letter, a fucking IM. And, yet, I get nothing. And then you just pop up on day. Out of nowhere. And think I'll be fucking okay with it fucking all. Well, I'm not. But you'll never fucking know.

But I won't stop it. Being with you is all I need for now. Being with you is all I've ever wanted.

Your Darling Kat.

~You were rid of me, why'd you want me back?~
(referring to: PJ Harvey - Album Rid of Me)
  • Current Music
    Damien Rice/PJ Harvey

(no subject)

Dear Blinking Cursor,

Please, stop taunting me with the mere fact that I cannot successfully transfer these incoherent thoughts from my foggy mind clearly onto this page. It would be nice if you stood there motionless for a while and waited patiently..

Non-thankfully Yours,
  • Current Music
    Coldplay - Don't Panic

(no subject)

dear dgcb,
I didn't care that you left and abandoned me, what hurts more is I woud still die for you.
Yea you're fucking straight you upset me. 5 years of everything and you still have a special place in my heart. but you know what you don't even bother with me anymore. we always try and figure out what happened between us and why we never talk. truth is you gave up. and i can't even think about it because it's the first time in forever i've cried. i still think about you everyday and whatever i don't even know. we were best fucking friends and we've been through so much together whatever i geuss it's cool that you just threw it away. but you totally know that you're still my daydream. please don't make me realize that 5 years of my life have been wasted even though i already know they have. ok i don't even know i'm really upset. bye.
sadly love always,