You're doing it again. Secluding yourself from everyone. Why don't you just go? Is it because you don't want to see him? You can't do this. You're aware that you hide yourself whenever a relationship ends, a meaningful one, so why don't you try to change it? By not seeing him you're not making it any better. He said he wanted to be friends, how is that possible if he never sees you, and vice versa? You were so different a few days ago. How did you change so fast? You went from one extreme to the next. How do you not understand this? Or are you just trying to convince yourself it's not about him?
If it's not, what is it about? Are you just tired? You've been out a lot lately. Could that be it? Or is this just denial?
Why is it hitting you now, of all times? You can't go down to San Antonio like this. You can't give him any reason to believe you're not happy here. All he'll do is preach to you about how you should have moved with him, and how he told you it'd be like this.
But it's not. You're happy here. So start acting like it.