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I'm living in your letters.. Breathe deeply from this envelope
 
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Saturday, December 11th, 2004

Time Event
12:15a
x
12:28a
You disgust me.

No, actually. I'm going to be mature about this. I'm actually not really sure that I care. Now that I've had plenty of time to think about it... why the hell would I want to be with anyone like you in the first place?

It was just kinda... weird.

When this ends in a week, I'm going to make sure that I'll be first one in line to tell you I told you so.
x
12:41p
1 ||x
2:17p
Dear Community,
I love letters, and I'm pretty sure you do to. It's been a while since I last posted, so here's my favorite letter style song for your enjoyment...


Dear Jamie,
I've got a letter I would like to send
It's lacking strings of words with punctuation at the end
Should I trust this dialect?
To convey the right effect?

Dear Jamie,
I've got some things I'd like to set in pen
I would have used a pencil, but lead's just not permanent
Should I trust my printer's ink?
To express the things I think?

Every page, I've tried my best
To think of something to contest
With inside jokes and other folks would have much more to say

Dear Jamie,
This envelope will represent my heart
I'll seal it, send it off, and wish it luck with its depart
This stamp will be every action
That carries my affection
Across the air, and land, and sea
Should I trust the postage due?
To deliver my heart to you?

Give it up, I can
Flowers and a hand
I hope this helps you see...
Signed, Sincerely me

Happy Holidays, everyone! ♥

Current Mood: creative
1 ||x
9:05p
dear anyone,


why do we depend on ppl? because we trust them and love them right? but what if we depend on ppl so much, that when they are gone, we feel like we cant survive?
what then?

do we just stop depending on others and just depend on ourselves? no we cant do that. because all that will do is turn us into quiet ppl who talk more in our minds than out loud because we dont want anyone feeling sorry for us. or telling us that they want to hear what we have to say.

but what about the ppl who are afraid to be alone? so terrified that one day everyone will ignore them or everyone will pack up and leave them behind. are those ppl who depend on other ppl way too much?

depending on others and depending on ourselves are split in half, with a white line down the middle. sometimes you can cross over to one side way too much. but that doesnt make you a terrible person or a perfect person.
your lucky if you can jus stay on that white line, that you can be dependent on yourself and on others.

but even if you are too dependent on yourself or too dependent on others, that doesnt mean your personality is screwed up.

it makes you different. and thats what they want us to be right. ourselves.

so go on.
be yourself already.



moi
x
10:52p
Will this ever end?
Dear Jonah:

I don't know why I'm like this.
I don't know why I think I need
you THIS bad. I've done so many
things that I said I would never do.

You make me want to scream.
You make me weak. And everyone
tells me to get over you...
and I want to. But something
is making me hold on. And you
obviously fucking hate me.

I really really love you.
With every bit of my heart.
I just don't understand where
things went wrong. I tried to be
the best for you. I tried my hardest
to make everything okay for you.
But as for everyone else...I'll
never be good enough for you.

It'll suck the one day you wake up
and realize I could've been the best
thing for you. But you've changed.
And I miss the OLD you. Not this cocky
shallow asshole. You can always put a smile
on my face. But afterwards I think about
how much of a jerk you were and cry.

I can only cry myself to sleep so long.
Its been so long since I've gone to sleep
without thinking about you and starting
to cry. All the memories we have...I can't
stop thinking about them. I can't stop
thinking about you...

I love you. I just wish it was enough
5 ||x

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