I'm living in your letters.. Breathe deeply from this envelope|
[Most Recent Entries]
Monday, November 15th, 2004
IM NOT YOUR FUCKING LITTLE GIRL. Current Mood: crappy
Have another fucking baby, and forget about me. &you know, im not kidding this time.
I absolutelyabsolutely hate being your only child, And me being one of your only priorites.
My friends feel like shit around you hey actually, my friends all think your a bitch also.
Im thinking.. if im not the only person who thinks your a bitch, much more people see it also.
You dont talk to my friends, you act like you despise each and every one of them. Are they really that bad?
Or Cooper.. dont let me get started on him. My first long term boyfriend, you invite him with you to one of my chorus concerts last year to watch me. Yet, you dont say one word to him. WHO FUCKING DOES THAT?!?!
Are you anti social? Im thinking you just have a problem.
Im done bitching to you. Its not worth it.
I just have one last word to say to you..
your a cold hearted bitch.
your only one; Destiny Rae Lopez.
cap: but your the same caring loveing girl i have always known
cap: i love you girl theres nothing you can say or do thats gunna change that k
cap: i love you and thats something that will never change tell me your problems dear im hear to listen my ears will always be open
I dont know.. what i would do without you.
your always there for me, without me even having to ask you.
You are.. my best friend.
I love knowing... you will always, always be there, and you will never stop loving me.
You know i would have something to write to you,
as i always do.. in each an every one of these fucking entries.
I dont feel the need to.
You fucking piss me off.
You dont like me, i know you dont...
STOP BEING SO COMPLICATING.
Thanks, im done.
I can't even begin a letter to you, though I used to write millions. This is a start, I guess. I wish you'd... leave me alone. I don't want to hear about your great life. Your new girlfriend. Your friends
. I'll be all typical and say... to hell with you and all your friends. I do not care. I've cared long enough to give up now. I like my life the way it is, and I don't want to go back to the way I was... when I was popular among my friends. I was happy then, yeah, I got attention and care and love. But then it was all just whipped away from me in seconds and it's all so messed up.. I'm happy on my own. I have a few new friends and I can live this way. I am happy
. And Linzi... everyone blamed me. Well you know what? I TRIED! I tried to get things back to the way they were but no, she wouldn't have it. And I dislike her. And I dislike so many people.
So fine.. I'm a bitch. I'm a total bitch. But I just want to live my life my own way.. I'll make my own decisions. They may be harsh, but they're mine.
|~*Wish I wasn't so sad,and pathetic,wish i didn't feel like this*~
thats how long i've liked you for.five fucking years and it...god i dunno. Everytime i see you I go numb...i shake and get nervous...i feel as though im going to throw up,and i almost do,but somehow i manage to keep it all down...manage not to blurt out how much i like you,how much i have done since the first day i saw you and how i can't imagine ever not liking you. God i hate myself so much for not being who you want...for not being good enough,for never going to be good enough for you.I hate it that you just look past me as though i'm non-existant,but i suppose in your perfect little 'Popular' world i am.because im just a fucking nobody that blushes at everything,that just...exists.urgh urgh urgh. I wish i was important to you...i wish i was someone that you would actually want to talk to,instead of someone you only talk to if its absolutely necessary,and theres no way out of it. Fuck i wish you loved me.