I'm living in your letters.. Breathe deeply from this envelope|
[Most Recent Entries]
Thursday, November 11th, 2004
I wonder what happened to us. We use to be so close.
Here we are now though. Distant. Looking at each other, but not seeing.
I miss you. I want to talk to you again. But what is there to talk about?
Sad story of drifting friends.
I still love you though. Always.
Don't hate you as much as I use to. You're actually pretty funny.
Join forces with me in killing Dylan? Thanks.
Kari Current Mood: contemplative
I can't help but think about your eyes every moment of my day, and the way you smell so good whenever I'm working on a test, or how good you make me feel when we sit around and talk about absolutely nothing for hours on end, and it all makes sense to us. You've made me feel complete these last few months, and I can't help but thank you. However, there's something lagging. I understand that you can get jealous, but nothing good comes from jealousy. You've accepted the fact that my best friend is of the 'male persuasion', and you've held your tounge when guys give me hugs or talk to me... but the fact that you don't want me in the band simply because you aren't friends with the singer and every person in it is male other than myself, I find stupid and hypocritical. You claim it's because we'll never get to see eachother, but you don't even bring up the fact that you yourself are in a band, that practices all the time, and plays shows almost every weekend. I realize at school we don't see eachother that much because of you being two grades ahead of me, but we do spend time together, and a lot. I just hope you don't get mad or upset, or even sad when you find out I won't truly quit my new band... I don't want you to feel insecure in our relationship, because I'm often finding myself wondering if this feeling I have for you is love.
Those three little words we haven't told one another yet, because I'm sure you're thinking along the lines that I am, that it should be perfect. And we would wait as well. We should make this relationship last, and not until we're completely head over heels do we drop that little sentence into the mix. But since you'll never read this, and since my feelings for you grow everyday... I think I love you.
I'm finally starting to smile again, and not just when I think of you. I'm starting to cry a bit less, and I can have a good time without thoughts of you upsetting me. I will always love you because you really are a part of me - but I think I'm finally starting to move on. Love is the times we shared, Love is that I will always love you, Love is that you taught me how to say goodbye.
Again, you have someone. And I'm alone.
L. Current Mood: meh.
|...and my heart, it now breaks.
My so-called... "Romeo";
whywhywhywhywwhy do you feel the need to lead me on?..
Why do i get jealous when you flirt with her,
your not mine, i cant get mad who your with or whatever..
but i still cant help but want to strangle you when i see it.
Why do i feel like your one of the biggest fucking liars ive ever met?
I am so scared of you..
its not like.. "frightened" scared of you..
just im scared to give myself to you..
wait nevermind, i think i already have.
And you have just enough of me to take advantage of... and i absolutely hate it.
I lied, i dont want to give you my heart anymore.
Im so scared.. your going to treat it like a piece of shit.
I HATE IT.
I hate how you know all the perfect ways to make me melt...
you know allllll my weaknesses, you are my weakness.
And you just hold it against me.
yeah, thats all im wondering.
You told me you were my Romeo,
arent you suppose to save me?
Do something.. instead of just hurt me.
Please.. stop breaking my heart.
Stop lying to me.
Nothing is going to happen between us is there?..
Your not really going to ask me out, you actually had no intention of it.
I always just get my hopes up.
I should of given up on you when i had the chance...
oh... you have to help me now.
I just dont know what to do anymore...
i cant save myself anymore... i cant pull myself through this one.
I have no where else to turn.
Jessika and Kelsey;
You are... my life.
I dont know.. where id be without you.
I would be one of the most depressed/suicidal kids you have ever met thats for sure.
This day... was one of the best days ive had.. in forever.
I cant live without the mother fucking A -Teammm.
You make me want to slap you in the face.
I know.. sounds mean, just stop fucking looking through my shit all the time,
and being SO NOSEY.
None of this, is any of your buisness.
So get off my case about anything&everything.
<3My Romeo/Sunshine.. whatever;
Alright.. so im back to you again?
I just.. needed to cool off.
If you dont want to be with me.. can you just give me one chance to be in your arms?
i dont care about the consequences. Current Mood: crushed
I just... want a kiss, i want you to hold me. Anything.
Tom.. i just freakin love you.
I hate saying that, i dont love you.
Of course not...
but i guess.. . .
its just enough for me to fall in love with you.. ?
Someone just smack me.