i want to hate you, just half as much as i hate myself.
& so lately, i've been grounded from everything
which means i've had absolutely nothing to do.
which means i've had alot of time to think.
which, knowing me, is never a good thing.
look what happened last time i had alot of time to think..
i've wrote you so many letters & just random shit.
i've thought of so many things to ask you..
so much shit to say to you..
but i've never got the chance to.
& im never going to.
because, if i do, you'll just think that i am "dragging it out for too long"
i can't stop crying.
all i've done lately, is sleep, cry & write.
oh yes, & think.
& i hate it.
i hate it i hate it i hate it.
i hate this.
i hate you.
alright, i lied.
i don't hate you.
i hate me for believe you.
i hate me for falling for you.
i hate me for loveing you.
i hate that you don't love me back.
& i hate that you never have.
& you never will.
& i hate how i can't stop thinking about you.
& i hate how everything i do, is somehow because of you.
from the stolen cigarette in my pajama drawer..
to what's hidden under my braclets.
it's all because of you, love.
and the really sad thing is,
you couldn't care less.
you really wouldn't give a shit.
i could fucking
and you'd be like "hm. well that's to bad"
"did you know i miss you??"
welll...i know you know.
the real question is;
"do you care that i miss you..??"
god..i miss you.
i still love you;
with all of
whats left of
my heart. Current Mood: i want to die.