dear jason,

after all i've gone through this year, i've come down to this conclusion: i need to be loved. how come no one seems to see me like you do? yet, why do you make it impossible to get to you. people say its because your shy, others say because you're afriad. well, i'm afraid too. but if you truly care about me the way you say you do, then let me know. end my misery, give me something to look forward to in this life. jason, you're the bright spot in my life, and i'd give up anything for you. i know you, you know me. trust me...


love forever,
eri

Current Mood: distressed

I choose to live I choose to live
Dear 'l',
So now you finally realise what i was going through while you told me to grow up
And you finally realise what its fucking like.
Part of me wants this to stop, because i dont want you to be destroyed by it
But the other half, it wants this to hurt so damn much you will never be able to wake up and have a day without thinking about them.
I woke up everyday, and wondered what was gonna happen to ruin it.
I now wake up everyday and wonder if im ever going to stop being so scared of what could have been.
And to add to my distrust, theres you, and them, yes, YOU AND THEM.
THEY made my life a misery and what did you expect me to do? Trust you undyingly?
You understand now, and i hope it hurts.
But i dont want it to... not completely
They ruined me, and i hope they at least affect you.
[they were right about you]
XxX

Current Mood: crazy