I'm living in your letters.. Breathe deeply from this envelope|
[Most Recent Entries]
Saturday, October 9th, 2004
I don't think you got the memo. IRAQ DIDN'T ATTACK US. Stop being a douchebag, stop ruining our country. kthxbye
Stop acting "holier than thou" just because you aren't Bush. There are things you have to stand up for yourself, you know. You're giving us no substance, other than "Bush sucks." Of course, it's the truth but dammit, there's gotta be more to you then "I'm not Bush, yayy!". I have no faith in you. You're not going to win if your only campaign hope is that you're not as much of a douche as he is, yet.
There's a huge gray area. Just because you're Christian doesn't mean you're automatically Republican, because they're pro-life. THIS ISN'T A ONE-TRICK PONY. Some issues are more important. Educate yourselves.
Don't just watch the news, but look things up, study things, learn who is better because neither one is always right.
And just because you don't agree with one issue with one, don't give up completely. He might be more of "your man" then the other. Bush isn't God, and Kerry won't save the world if he's elected. Please pray, and learn as much as you can before you go out there and vote. That's all you can do.
-Susan Current Mood: rather emo or something
Dear Jess and Britt,
I really don't know what happened. It's like one minute you guys want to try to still be friends and the next you don't want anything to do with me. I didn't lie to you. I have felt left out...I haven't gotten the messages that you called. I didn't know where Jess was to call her and if I left a message I didn't think she would call me back or even get the message for that matter. Sometimes I feel like you guys walk all over me...and treat me like a little girl because I'm quiet. I just haven't felt like you wanted me as a friend. I've tried to be there for you guys for everything...I haven't gone behind your backs and stole your boyfriends...I just nodded my head when you guys smoked I wasn't like omg...you can't do that. Yea, I don't like it at all, but I've never said you absolutely have to stop. I said I think you should and I think it's bad for you because it is and I've rolled my eyes when you do it and I'm around, but that's because I don't like the stuff. I never will like the stuff. I don't think I've been a bad friend to you guys and if I have I'm sorry. But if you could please tell me what I've done to make you not even want to be friends with me anymore then please do. I would love to know because maybe it's something I can fix. I'm not going to stop being friends with Emily. She has been a good friend to me and she hasn't done anything wrong to me. Yea, she's done some pretty messed up shit in the past, but so has everyone else. I have, you have, everyone in this world has. I'm willing to talk this out. I'm willing to try and make things right again. I don't know why it feels like I'm the only one who cares that we are just throwing away a friendship here. I've learned to fight for what I want and I don't want to lose you guys as friends. Now here's to you guys seperately:
I met you at a time when I was sitting home every friday night doing absolutely nothing because no one ever called me to make plans and I didn't call anyone to make plans. I only made plans with Felicia and Jill and that was when they weren't hanging out together. Right away you were someone I could go to talk to if I needed to talk about something. I know I didn't do that much, but I tried. After awhile though, it seemed all we talked about was you and what's going on in your life and everytime I tried to bring up something about me you would change the subject. I know sometimes I talk about things you could never possibly understand because you haven't been through it so a lot of time you don't know what to say, but that's ok all I need is someone to listen to me. Britt, I'm sorry for you pushing you away because I got scared of losing my two best friends and getting hurt. I've lost so many friends in the past couple of years and I didn't want it to happen again so I pushed you away. I found a reason to get mad. I still think it's a pretty good reason, but I found one. I don't want to lose you as a friend. Things probably won't be like they were before for a long time, but I really think we can work this out and still know that we can rely on each other if we are needed.
I don't know what I did to you at all. If anything I should be mad at you. You are the one saying all these horrible things to me...well I guess you aren't saying them you are writing them in my journal. Jess, it's not all my fault. Some of it is my fault, but some of it's your fault too. I want you to remember who came to your house at midnight and sat there with you while you were all hopped up on drugs and so were the 3 other people around you. I want you to remember who sat there and listened you and hugged you while you cried over John or someone else. I was there for you Jess, I tried my hardest to be a good friend to you and now you want nothing to do with me. I just really don't understand Jess. You are the one who accused me of being a bad friend because you assumed that I liked Chris. I don't know what else to say to you, but I give up. If you want us to be friends again, I'm here. I'm not going to be your enemy and I'm not going to start anything with you if I see you. I'm always going to be here even if you don't want me to be.
Well, I think that's all I need to say for now. Hopefully we will work things out. I don't know what else to say.
Jess Current Mood: I don't know, but it's not goo