August 7th, 2004



Dear you...

I hate this. I hat saying no to you and yet I hate doing this even more. I've learn to say no but not to you. It's not something I've mastered. I'd rather do things in person then on the internet. In person there's only the memories of people not a hard record of what was said or done. I hate this game and you knew that but I went along with it because I didn't want you to get once again I'm dreading when you might type the fourth letter in the alphabet. Silly I know but I feel like I just stepped back into like february sophomore year. I do this to myself a lot it seems. The one thing I can't do is to ask or to talk about what has happened.

You just did it. You changed letters and frankly I don't have any ideas for you. I don't want to think of ideas for you. GOD I should have jsut said no.

(no subject)

dear you-
i love you so much, with every word you say i just fall more and more in love with you. you once felt the same about me but its hard to say if you still do. i know we both want to be together and we both love eachother enough, but its impossible. virtually impossible. i am your best friend and you are mine, but it is not enough and i will do anything and everything to make you mine. you are the best thing that has ever happened to me and even when you leave me unintentionally i will always fallow and never ever EVER forget.
-love me

Never fall in love with love.

To Lucas,
I rode the bus with you today.
It was a rainy night. The lights of the city, as we passed through, reflected off the windows - the rain turning the light into haze. It was one of the most beautiful feelings.
My hand in yours felt so right in that moment.
I know I will never find someone like you.
You are the most stimulating person I have met: mentally, emotionally, physically.
In all senses of the word, you are exquisite.
I know I will never find another like you as my heart desires me to. But I do know I will find someone who I will love, and who will love me back as you do. Someone who will treat me as you do, and give me the things as you do. It just makes me sad that it cannot be you sometimes.
I will never find another like you, but I will always have you.
I grew a little today.
dum-dums // __iiicons

(no subject)

you -

l is for the way you look at me
(like, if you touch me one more time, i'm going to punch you, whether you're a girl or not)
o is for the only one i see
(except for those guys earlier this year. sorry, they were accidents)
v is very very extraordinary
(just like your obsession with aragorn from lord of the rings)
e is even more than anyone that you adore
(except maybe jill, you bastard. i look exactly like her, dumbass)
love is all that i can give to you
(and maybe a couple d&d books, cause i know you like those)
love is more than just a game for two
(yeah, it HAS to involve your best friend trying to talk you into dating me)
two in love can make it, take my heart and please don't break it
(like you did the last two times)
love was made for me and you
(yeah, it was)