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Wednesday, March 3rd, 2004

Time Event
5:14a
<3
dear someone,
hey how are things going? im doing alright myself these days. i guess ive felt sorta used by you in the past weeks...like lead on maybe? not a good feeling. at all. when you magically popped up one day w/ a new random gf i was honestly crushed. its crazy. i know i shouldnt go holding grudges since you dont even KnOW i feel this way, but yeah. its kinda hard since i thought we could have something going on and all. remember when you came and sat by me in our class we have together? and when you talked to me but seemed sorta nervous like and you rambled....haha.... yeah even though i was a little quiet and all...i totally enjoyed even your slight presence next to me :) ...we have so much in common is crazy so why didnt this all work out like i had imagined in my head? was it only my wishful thinking causing such thoughts? or were you into me at one point like i thought? you seemed sorta obvious :-/ ...also, i tried to get over you. you've been shut out of my thoughts for about a week or so now. last night however, i realized i truly like you. who am i kidding trying to act like you mean NoTHiNG to me? you do. you mean the world to me. and when that thing happened a while back, i wanted to be there for you. it hurt me sO bAD to see you hurting also. anyway, all in all, you're totally awesome and i would do anything just to have you think of me as way more. its ok though....im ok. just think about everything and maybe one day we can work something out...until then the whole friends thing is a-ok w/ me xoxo
<3 <3 <3

Current Mood: confused
x
12:56p
to him

i think i've fallen for you......

and i think i might actually love you....

but i don't want to.....

Current Mood: calm
x
4:57p
Oh fuck.

I guess the joke's on me now, eh?
x
9:25p
Dear Theresa,
First of all, I want to make sure you know that I love you. I truly do! You're my best friend. I tell you almost everything! But I feel like I need to come clean. The last four months, we've been drifting. I'd like to say it's all my fault, blame myself 100% and make a change to get back to the "good ole times". But there's just some things that I can't change.

Let me sum things up:
~~MONEY!! You have no job as of yet; I do, and am sick of being pressured to buy you things. You have no bills whatsoever, and I have many. You get money from your parents which you waste on food for your bf or stupid items from the dollar store which you break or lose within a week.
~~TIME!! Mike and I spend time together doing things other then have sex. You and Eddie have a relationship that seems little more then that. Don't get me wrong. You say you love the guy after knowing him for two weeks, and I'll believe you. But don't go pointing your finger at me about Mike. Leave him out of this. Yes, I try to spend a lot of time with him. If Eddie didn't live so far away, maybe you guys would see each other more often too. I also work three jobs and go to college full time. When I'm not working, I tend to have A LOT of homework I'm trying to keep up on to the best of my ability. So I am busy. I don't see you every other night like we used to. That's not my fault, so please don't hold that against me.
~~ATTITUDE!! I have a mouth and will use it as I see fit. I have an opinion and will share it. This does not mean you have to agree with me. I hope you never feel pressured to do so. But please don't put me down for having an opinion of my own and knowing WHY I have that opinion. I have reasons for my beliefs. Please get your own and know why you have them. Then stick to them.

I still love you. I hope we can make this friendship last. I would still do anything I could for you.

Love,
me
3 ||x
11:42p
Dear Kenny,

I wish you knew how much you mean to me. We had such a good time this weekend, and I wish I could relive it over and over again. I have been, in my mind. And I miss you already. I can't wait to see you again.

I will wait for you if you want me to. For as long as I have to.

Thank you for helping me through each day. Thank you for being so warm and giving to me. Thank you for being you, and thank you for sharing you with me.

Love, Mic
1 ||x

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