Why can't I find him? Why does he only live in my dreams? I want to find him.
I want him to be non judge-mental. I want him to take the world as it comes like I do. I want him to think positive. I want him to be silly. I want him to hold me, just to hold me. I want him to love himself and his life before me and with me even more. I want him to cry when he feels like it. I want him to realize that I am a tad dramatic sometimes, but I want him to also realize that I don't want to be a drama queen, and he will be so un-dramatic that he will be able to teach me how not to be. I want him to be understanding. I want him to be able to talk to me. I want him to be able to have pillow fights in the wee hours of the morning. I want him to tell me it's okay. I want him to find some really annoying habbit of mine, cute. I want him to carry me to bed when I fall asleep on the couch because he doesn't like to sleep without me. I want my cares to become his cares. We won't need much money, because it doens't make us who we are. I want his heart to ultimately choose me over everyone and everything.
I dream that he will be, tall, to tower over me and protect me from anything. He will have that smile that will make me dream about him for another lifetime. He will have dark eyes that will smile at me just as much as his lips did. And his hair.. will be dark, shaggy, and smooth. It will hang in his eyes somedays and he will flip it to the side of his face in the mornings to see me sleeping. He can wear loose ripped jeans. Band t-shirts & hoodies. When it it cold, he will give them to me to wear. He may have piercings, tongue and\or labret. No tattoos. He will be slender, but not too much. He will also carry himself like he is the king of his own kind, gentle, world. Everyone will fall in love with him. But he will only love me. He may or may not have a guitar slung around his shoulder. If he can't sing, he will sing to me anyway, and like to.