I'm living in your letters.. Breathe deeply from this envelope|
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Monday, February 16th, 2004
|Pack your bags, we're going on a guilt trip... How's that for gratitude...
NOVEMBER 08, 2003
I kicked Richard out. He lived in my house for 3 months. I paid all the bills here. $1200 for rent and utilities etc. plus another $350/ mo on groceries. The price tag for all this- almost $4800 and a whole lot of drama. Yeah, I realize he doesn't have a car, but he asked me one time to take him to see about a job. ONE time. A job that was a 30 minute drive from our house. So that meant that someone would have had to drive him there, drive home, drive back and pick him up, and then drive home again. 2 hrs. worth of driving a day to take him back and forth to work, not to mention the wear and tear on the vehicle doing it. Micah's car... in the shop. Who does that leave? Me. I have to take my kid to school in the mornings. I'm sick as crap all the time and just generally having a really hard pregnancy. I am responsible for ALL of the finances in this household. Plus, I have a job. HELLO, there isn't enough hours in the day. I do enough for him...far more than his attitude would inspire anyone else to. If he said half the stuff to me that he says to Kim, he would already be missing some teeth. As it is, she won't even speak to him anymore. Nobody cares if he fucked her or not. None of my business who anyone has sex with but me (although I know more than a few busy bodies who think they are on a right-to-know basis about that sort of thing...nosey fuckers and trouble makers that they are). He's hateful to Sera. I think he's jealous of my relationship with Micah. I heard him saying things about me that I don't like when he thought I was asleep. What a shit. A general air of unpleasantness has permeated our household since he has become a part of it. The only person here that he showed any kind of courtesy was Micah and I think tha's because he MIGHT be under the misapprehension that Micah is the one who is bankrolling him. Plus, he's a total slob. He needed to go. Current Mood: disgusted
He said "oh, well families disagree sometimes...blah, blah, blah...". Yeah, he went there.
If I could say anything to him right now I'd say that first off, Kim is my best friend, and she was actually trying to get a job. Micah is my boyfriend. That's right, I said "MY BOYFRIEND" because no matter how much you and your 'tard friends go around telling people he isn't, that's not what he says, so you can go and eat shit Richard. You tried to paint this picture like Micah was gaming me and I'm just a fuck. Micah doesn't play. Anyone who really knows him would realize that if that were the case he'd be real with me about it instead of trying to pretend he was with me while he was scamming on hookers phone numbers and shit, so save it, please. I've known you for a year, most of which you have been gone to WV. I've been friends with Kim for 5 years, and with Micah for 8 years. They have been through everything with me. THEY ARE MY FAMILY. Please, don't flatter yourself like that. Second, there is a fine line between helping a friend out and being taken for a ride... that line has been crossed. You were totally taking advantage of the situation. It's over with now, and it doesn't matter. AS for Micah, yeah, he is your friend. But we are having a child together, and family is the tie that binds. I'm not going anywhere. Micah is happy, and you should be happy for him, instead of being such an attention whore. I don't hate you, but I dislike the atmosphere that you created in my home. I'm sorry if you feel that you have been mistreated, but I think I bit my tongue for far to long. I'm done being nice.
its sucks to think this because you are my bestfriend but you always seem to be tring to put me down and make me feel like shit about myself and i hate it.i mean your best friend shouldnt do that to you.i mean people say a lot of shit about you and i dont tell you because i dont like to make you feel bad but it seems you just really dont care.
You are one of THE meanest people I know, you make fun of everyone about everything just to make yourself feel better. It's sad that you are so insecure that you have to do that. I feel sorry for you when it comes to that matter. Everything I do is wrong to you. What I wear, how I talk, what I say, EVERYTHING. But I'm tired of it. I don't want you to look at me, speak to me, or acknowledge me in anyway. I DO NOT WANT YOU TALKING ABOUT ME BEHIND MY BACK. I know vengeance is very bad, but I must admit that when someone REALLY hurts me like you did, I get revenge. If you keep this shit up with all your little digs at me, you will be sorry. People tell me everything you say about me and I believe them over you. If you don't know the full story about something (what happened the night Ashley missed her ride and I wasn't there) don't say anything. You only make yourself look like an ass. You would be surprised if you knew how many people have come up to me and said that they don't like you because you're mean/rude/selfish. You are one of the most selfish and lazy people I know. Everything you do is for yourself and you don't give a damn about others. Why the hell are you even in More Than Us?!?! It's a waste of time for you. You're too selfish to do anything like that. And you're trying to make people "choose sides"?!?! How dumb is that?!?! I've never met a person like you. The only way I know how to deal with you is to ignore you, because if I don't I'll explode. I don't know why it took me so long to realize what a mean person you are. I'm glad I finally see the real you. We will never be friends again, I refuse to put up with people like you. What you did/the way you acted has hurt me so much. You've lowered my self confidence by making fun of me about everything. I'm so mad at myself for believing the things you say. I can't believe I allowed myself to get so weak. I can't believe our "friendship" lasted as long as it did. I don't know how the hell that happened. I guess all I'm asking for right now is for you to just forget about me and leave me alone. Don't talk about me to other people, I don't do that to you. Just forget me! I know all the things you've said about me, and I will admit that they hurt a whole lot, but it's time to let go or else YOU WILL FACE THE CONSEQUENCES.
Dana Current Mood: infuriated