sometimes i wonder what your life would be like without me. if you would be seeing anyone. if you would be happier. you tell me everyday that i'm your favorite and that you love me, and goddamn, you know the feeling's mutual. i'm just tired of being a little girl. especially around your friends. i know you say i'm mature and your friends agree, but i still feel left out. and kind of really dumb. a lot of times i'm jealous, even when i have no grounds to be. you have friends that are girls that you've had forever and a day. i just don't want to lose you, and i don't want them to fall in love with you. and vice versa. i guess i'm being selfish, by not wanting you to give them hugs and to tell them they're beautiful and to care about them. and i know that's not right, and i don't really want that. i just feel sick. and i can't help it. i want nothing more than for you to be happy. i think, sometimes, i'm holding you back. i think that i don't mentally stimulate you enough. i think we should just stop with the physical stuff, not because i don't like it, but just because i love you and want to feel intelligent. i'm driving myself crazy trying to be good enough for you, but i'll never be. i love you. iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou.