burninginhell (burninginhell) wrote in _letterstoyou_,
burninginhell
burninginhell
_letterstoyou_

dear world,
I don't want to go home. this was the first year I didn't experience the linak party fights directly and I really don't want to go home. See every year my mom and stepdad go to his work's christmas party and get extrememly drunk. then they come home and fight. last year he tried to sophicate her as she screamed at me to call 911. this year since I was around my older sister babysat my younger brother. She said when mom and jud got home jud was bleeding all over and upset and my mom was mad.. Apparenlty my mom had tried to beat jud up while he was driving home. she knocked his glasses off once which means she was reaching completely over him which scares me. they could have been dead. andthe first thought in my mind when I heard this that I would have been here with no one to talk to and no way to go home earlier. I would have had to finish my finals and gone home a week after this event. but yet I was soo grateful they weren't fighting in the house. As much as my sister tried to protect my childhood I want to protect justins. domestic violence is not funny. I don't want to go back there. I just feel so alone right now. and yet when I go home I feel as if so many of the emotions will be fake. I have no money. I need new contacts and more medicine and I feel bad asking m y parents for this money and money to fix my car. I want to be a kid again and by kid I mean like 3 when everything was okay. I want to for once in my life not worry about money but that's not going to happen. I really need to find a job for next semester so that I can have some money. I don't know how I'm going to pay for everything I need to unless I get some money for chirstmas which is another thing I'm not looking forward to. Christmas was never my favorite holiday


BAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

signed,
the girl that has no voice
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