It's just so sad, knowing what life was like with her in my life.
It's sad, knowing what life will continue to be like without her in my life.
A year ago, last January, my Grandmother died. No one is certain what caused it, but I'm certain that her emphazema due to smoking was the bringing of her downfall. I know it's not healthy to still be this effected by it, but I feel bad. For nine years of my life I was no more than a mile away from her. I loved her dearly and she did I. But after I started going to college we slipped further and further apart.
It's not my wish that I had spent more time with her, I know I Was doing what I thought I wanted to, and she understood that. I just wish I had taken the time to chat with her, even if it was only online. So few have a chance to know their grandparents, REALLY know them. Even fewer can do so, so easily. I hate myself every day how much I took that for granted, because now it's gone. Her birthday would've been just last thursday (10/12), and so I reflect on this all.
Godspeed gram, we all know you're doing much much better now.