Christopher Infante (x0pherx) wrote in _inmemoryof_,
Christopher Infante
x0pherx
_inmemoryof_

Healing.

It's been nearly a year ago.
It's just so sad, knowing what life was like with her in my life.
It's sad, knowing what life will continue to be like without her in my life.

A year ago, last January, my Grandmother died. No one is certain what caused it, but I'm certain that her emphazema due to smoking was the bringing of her downfall. I know it's not healthy to still be this effected by it, but I feel bad. For nine years of my life I was no more than a mile away from her. I loved her dearly and she did I. But after I started going to college we slipped further and further apart.

It's not my wish that I had spent more time with her, I know I Was doing what I thought I wanted to, and she understood that. I just wish I had taken the time to chat with her, even if it was only online. So few have a chance to know their grandparents, REALLY know them. Even fewer can do so, so easily. I hate myself every day how much I took that for granted, because now it's gone. Her birthday would've been just last thursday (10/12), and so I reflect on this all.

Godspeed gram, we all know you're doing much much better now.
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