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Entries by tag: crackfic

JJ/Emily // Fic // Of Mothers and Whiskey

Title: Of Mothers and Whiskey
Author: elekanahmen aka Jax
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Pairing: JJ/Emily
Disclaimer- I don't own them, as they're clearly NOT chained up in my closet
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: As the title implies, there's alcohol consumption aplenty.
Summary: Emily has the team over for Thanksgiving and an unexpected visitor turns her world upside-down.
Author's Note: This takes place in the W-W-W? Universe, translation: Will? Who's Will? (Will doesn't exist here). This is fic #6 in the "All Your Bunnies Are Belong To ME" Challenge, tranqui wanted CM: JJ/Emily, Ambassador Prentiss outs Emily to the team and betrays her prediliction for blondes, Crack/Humor, PG-13. We discussed it and decided there's no time like Thanksgiving to get Elizabitch Prentiss drunk. Happy belated Thanksgiving, Americans... Happy watch dysfunctional families time, everyone else. Special thanks to babyfirefly for being my most amazing gf ever, pina_spence for Alcoholic Beverage Reference time, lostnfoundcause for the spectacular last minute beta of win and awesome. Sorry it's so sporadic, me writing lately. A combination of suddenly having a life *points at JJ*, having school and having responsibilities has left my fic writing well rather dry. I'll be trying to write more over Christmas, no promises, but there IS a fic that I wrote for the exchange at cm_exchange that my beta mcgarrygirl78 says is freaking awesome and hot and amazing, so take her word for it. Not saying anything else about it because it could be for one of you! O.o

Then the doorbell rang. Everyone looked expectantly at their hostess who raised a cool eyebrow, just as baffled as them, making her way to the door.Collapse )
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JJ/Emily // Fic // A Very Wicked Halloween

Title: A Very Wicked Halloween
Author: elekanahmen aka Jax
Fandom: Criminal Minds, somewhat Wicked
Pairing: JJ/Emily
Disclaimer- I don't own them, as they're clearly NOT chained up in my closet
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Smut, Halloween Costume Sex
Summary: Emily's Nerdgeekery leads to JJ begrudgingly dressing up as Glinda while Emily goes as Elphaba for Halloween at work. Established relationship/marriage, based on "Wives & Conventions"
Note: For babyfirefly who begged me to write this after our date at Wicked, for calliopes_muse for the discussion I recall us having about this and her encouragement, for sofia_lindsay even though she doesn't like Wicked, I based the story on her piece "Wives & Conventions" in her universe and following the events of said story.
Note 2: This was SUPPOSED to be for Emily Prentiss Appreciation Day but I've had a busy week (mostly because I keep going down to LA to babyfirefly but I figured I ought to at LEAST post it for Halloween.
Note 3:   I   don't know if my cuts are working right now. If not i'll fix it.


 

 


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JJ/Emily // Fic // The Hostage Situation

Title: The Hostage Situation
Author: elekanahmen aka Jax
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Pairing: JJ/Emily
Disclaimer- I don't own them, as they're clearly NOT chained up in my closet
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Food-laced-sex, SMUT (don't read this at school, kids). Cracky, fluffy, smutty sex. Little plot.
Summary: Emily finds herself looking down a rather unexpected barrel.
Note: Fic #2 in the "All Your Bunnies Are Belong To ME" Challenge, aka the "I'm bored, give me a prompt" challenge on my lj. sofia_lindsay, I will never look at a bottle of Hershey's Syrup or tile floors the same way. And for that, I salute you, oh Queen of Smut.
Prompt: Smut/NC17 (of course), Chocolate sauce is involved.

Agent Prentiss, I’m going to have to ask you to surrender the cake and step away from the table.Collapse )
Title: Prepare To Be Boarded (or Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day)
Author: elekanahmen aka Cap'n Jax
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Pairing: JJ/Emily (First Mate Black Stoli/Jenny Jareau, Governor's Daughter)
Disclaimer - I don't own them, as they're clearly NOT chained up in my closet talking like pirates.
Rating: NC-17 (Arrrr? Haha, get it? Rated Arrrrr?)
Warnings: Smut, Offenses Against Grammar, Excessive Pirate Speak, Role Playing, Light S&M, Preggo Sex, Sex Toys, Crack!Fic, Swearing, Pillaging, Rifling, Plundering, Bad Jokes.
Summary: Emily gets kinky for International Talk Like A Pirate Day
Note: September 19th is International Talk Like A Pirate Day. So in celebration, on and off today, I've been working on this delightful piece of crack. Not crap, crack. All warnings above are applicable, for serious. sofia_lindsay here is your smut, calliopes_muse here is your preggo smut. To everyone else: YARRR ye blaggards! Read it or walk the plank! YARR! (Also, writing this in Word was a trip because it kept trying to correct my grammar. Hahaha)
Reposted for Archiving (Last one i swear)

This mission be not for the faint o’ heart, but avast, me harties, ‘tis an adventure you’ll nay soon forget.Collapse )

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