May 24th, 2006

(no subject)

it hurts not knowing if you feel the same way i do.
i'm always second guessing it, and i hate it.
i care about you. a lot.
and i just want to know.
you make me feel special.
i want to know if you're doing it for a reason.
please?
i hate guessing, i dont want to make a fool of myself.

you are going to change my life.
you don't even know how much that terrifies me.
i don't know if i'm ready for it, but i'll try my best.
for you.
  • Current Mood
    good good
patsy stone thanxgiving

(no subject)

there is nothing I love about myself.
I have been depressed for 10 years now. I'm in the constant state of BLAH.
I'm really really sick and tired of it.
I refuse to take the meds my doctor prescribed because I don't see it as a solution.
I need to talk to someone...someone who will help me through.
I am a broke-assed college student. When I asked my mom for financial help so I can afford a counselor, she laughed at me..

Now I don't know what to do.
When I look at myself in the mirror, there's nothing there. As if something in me has died.
And I know that the only thing that would make me feel alive and happy would hurt those that love me...
  • Current Mood
    blah blah
playground love

(no subject)

I get crazy angry whenever I lose ANYTHING. I just lost a pair of really awesome sunglasses, and I just got them! My friends don't understand why I get so upset, but it bothers the FUCK out of me. I hate wasting money. UGH.
  • Current Mood
    annoyed annoyed

(no subject)

I really try to be happy and have fun, but it's so hard when everyone wants me dead and all I can think about is how much I want my dead too.

&&

I wish you would stop lying to me.

&&

Just thinking makes me feel sick to my stomache. I can't take any of this that is floating through my head.

skinny girl

tomorrow I'm doing a speech on how
the skinny pictures in magazines
could lead to girls becoming
anorexic. and how its wrong.

i chose that topic so i can find
pictures to put up on my mirror.

because i want to be skinny too.

(no subject)

my ideal prom was almost complete

i have the cutest dress
picked out the best hair,
makeup and shoes.
limo
hotel
dinner


but my prom date was supposed to
be him he asked a whore.

now im going with a guy who i
NEVER though i would go with.
i said yes, only because i didn't
want to go alone.
justlive

(no subject)

I really like him.
I have since 7th grade.
I found out that he was with a girl that I really dislike. I kept wishing they would break up.
They broke up today.
They were only together for about two days.
I don't feel the least bit guilty for wishing they would break up.