WTF, Inc.

Terrifying Local TV Holiday Ads

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 23:44:20 GMT

Oh....Florida

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 21:56:21 GMT

Man and woman with same name met through Facebook, getting married

Kelly Hildebrandt is in love with Kelly Hildebrandt, and soon they'll be married.

It's been a whirlwind romance for the guy and gal who share the same name, and it all started with an innocent Facebook message.

"She started off 'Hey, I saw we have the same name,and I thought it was kind of cool, Just wanted to say hi I guess. LOL,'" the male Kelly said.

Kelly the female, from Coral Springs, was curious to see profiles of people with the same name when she happened across Kelly the male in Lubbock, Texas.

"I searched my own name and he's the only one who came up and actually in the picture he didn't have a shirt on and I was like oh he's cute," said the female Kelly.

Three weeks later, male kelly flew to South Florida to meet female Kelly, and they hit it off immediately.

And now in just three months, the Hildebrandts will officially be married.

"We get a couple of the same reactions, usually it's like 'whoa, that's so awesome and totally different,'" said female Kelly, 20.

Male Kelly, 24, has moved down to Florida and plans on working at the new branch for his company, Primerica Financial. Female Kelly is finishing up her studies at Palm Beach Community College.

The wedding will be at Lighthouse Point Yacht Club in October, a quick turnaround -- just eight months after the two first met -- though male Kelly has no reservations.

"I felt like there was a good possibility that before I ever came out to meet her in person, that this could be the girl I'm gonna marry," he said.

The marriage won't be without problems. In fact, one problem has already presented itself before the two have even stepped foot on the altar.

"He's even already got some mail coming in, and we have to open everything, because we don't know whose mail is whose," said female Kelly.

A small WTF...pics and article at the source

Source

Banned German Sprite ad

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 21:39:32 GMT

Because gobbling big black cock makes me thirsty for a refreshing citrus beverage:

This may not exactly be work safe.

Getting paid to watch someone die...

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 19:55:51 GMT

Could you do it?

By Dave Alsup
CNN

(CNN) -- It takes seven minutes to execute a death row inmate, according to the state of Texas.

At that rate, Mike Graczyk has spent about 40 hours of his life watching men -- and a few women -- die.

Graczyk, a correspondent for The Associated Press, is believed to hold a macabre record. He's almost certainly watched more executions than anyone else in the United States.

"I can't possibly imagine there's been someone present at more than Mike," said Michelle Lyons, the spokeswoman for the Texas Department of Criminal Justice, which uses lethal injection at its execution chamber in Huntsville.

Since the death penalty was reinstated in 1976, no state has executed more inmates than Texas. And no one has witnessed more of them than Graczyk.

He's on the witness list for 315 of the state's 439 executions -- more than any other reporter, prison employee or chaplain -- and no records were kept for another 80. Interactive map: See how Texas compares with other states »

In his early days, he kept count. But he eventually stopped. He didn't want to know.

"In one circle, I was perceived as putting notches on my gun belt," the 59-year-old reporter said. "I didn't like that."

Prison regulations in Texas require The Associated Press to be given one of the five designated media witness passes for each execution.

Graczyk works in the AP's Houston bureau -- it's closest to the state's execution chamber in Huntsville. Since the early 1980s, he's made the hourlong drive north almost every time an inmate has faced the needle.

The first was March 13, 1984, for the execution of James "Cowboy" Autry, convicted of shooting a female store clerk between the eyes with a .38-caliber revolver while arguing over a six-pack of beer.

She died, along with a former Catholic priest that Autry killed at the crime scene.

"The first time definitely leaves an impression on you," Graczyk said.

There are others that stand out along the way.

Graczyk remembers Bob Black, convicted of killing his wife and trying to collect the insurance money.

"I walked into the death house, and he was strapped to the table and he said, 'Hey Mike, how are you doing?' It threw me for a loop."

Graczyk said it's normal for him to know the name of the condemned and not uncommon for the reverse to be true. There have been others who greeted Graczyk by name with a needle in their arm.

Once, while waiting to be let into the death house, a prisoner phoned him in the media holding area.

It was the inmate whose execution Graczyk was about to witness.

"He said, 'I just wanted to call and make sure you were OK.' I was flabbergasted."
Don't Miss

Over the years, the inmate's name has slipped from Graczyk's memory, but not the unexpected phone conversation.

"I don't think he had any family to call," he said.

There was Ponchai Wilkerson, who once nearly escaped from death row and, years later, coughed up a handcuff key as he lay dying from his injection.

There was the "Candy Man," Ronald Clark O'Bryan -- convicted of poisoning his child's Halloween candy with cyanide -- and the gauntlet of college students wearing Halloween masks who showed up to cheer.

And Karla Faye Tucker, the first woman executed in Texas since the 1800s. He remembers a network correspondent crying after her death -- and another blow-drying his hair.

Of the entire death chamber ritual, Graczyk said, it's the final statements that stick in his mind. Some have been confessions. Others were denials.

Poetry. Prayers. Bible verses. Curses. Emotions ranging from defiance to resignation.

There was Jonathan Nobles, an electrician who stabbed two people to death. He sang "Silent Night."

"Ever since then, I think of him on Christmas or Christmas Eve when I'm in church," Graczyk said. "That's the kind of thing that haunts you."

The person who may come closest to Graczyk's status also felt things that haunted him.

Don Reid, a writer for the AP and, before that, a Texas newspaper, witnessed 189 executions in the 1960s, when Texas still strapped inmates to "Old Sparky," the nickname for the state's electric chair.

The experience changed Reid, who died in 1981, from a supporter of the death penalty to an opponent. He wrote a book, "Have a Seat, Please," chronicling that transformation.

Graczyk said he doesn't worry about the mental toll of watching so many deaths. His bosses with the AP have offered counseling. He's declined.

"To see someone go to sleep -- not to sound insensitive -- but the carnage at the murder scene is harder than what you see in the death house in Huntsville," he said.

Over a 25-year career, Graczyk said, the executions have only been a small portion of his work. He finds balance in those other stories.

As a journalist, Graczyk never answers the question when friends ask his own views on the death penalty.

"I'm not sure I really know," he said.

But as long as Texas keeps executing people, Graczyk said, it's important that he keep showing up.

The next execution in Huntsville was scheduled for Thursday before the condemned, convicted murderer Kenneth Mosley, was granted a reprieve until September.
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If the execution goes ahead then, Graczyk plans to make the drive.

"I would hate for the state of Texas to take someone's life and no one be there," he said.

Texas execution facts

Texas executions since death penalty was reinstated: 439

Cost per execution for drugs used : $86.08

Average time on death row before execution: 10.26 years

Youngest inmate executed: Three at 24

Oldest inmate executed: 66

Women executed: 3

Source: Texas Department of Criminal Justice

juice

And just for funsies, here's a site where you can take a look at the last statements of the most recent 439 inmates executed in the great state of Texas. You can also access their offender information.

Here is one from TruTV in slide show format; it includes mugshots.

But really, do you think you could do this guy's job- this portion of it, anyway? There's the time you actually spend watching the execution, but what about the drive there, knowing what you're about to see, and the drive back, replaying it over and over in your head? Do you think you'd become immune to it eventually? Or do you think you'd wind up accepting that free therapy offered by your boss?

Don't Get Sicky With It

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 19:25:22 GMT

Talk about an over-reaction...

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 19:23:52 GMT

Motorist
jumps to his death after two-car crash

Police in New Brunswick are trying to determine why a man involved in a
two-car crash on the weekend bolted from his vehicle, ran to a nearby
overpass and jumped to his death.

Investigators say the man was the lone occupant of a vehicle that left
the road after it collided with a second vehicle carrying four people
near Grand Bay-Westfield, northwest of Saint John.

Police say the man, in his early 40s, ran from his car, shouting, "I
never seen them. I never meant to hit him."

He then jumped over a guard rail and fell to his death.

The occupants of the other vehicle were taken to hospital to be treated
for minor injuries.

Dozens in HK get blown

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 11:13:19 GMT

PULL STRING: receive poop

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 05:55:24 GMT

Welcome to America!

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 04:41:18 GMT

When does a snapshot of a mother breast-feeding her child become kiddie porn? Ask the Richardson police.By Thomas Korosec
The service was fast, the judgments even hastier. Never did Jacqueline Mercado imagine that four rolls of film dropped off at an Eckerd Drugs one-hour photo lab near her home would turn her life inside out, threaten to send her to jail and prompt the state to take away her kids.

Jacqueline Mercado, a 33-year-old Peruvian immigrant, took a few photos of her young children at bath time. A week later, Richardson police were rummaging through her house for kiddie porn, and a state child welfare worker came to take her kids away.

The photo in question: Jacqueline Mercado and Johnny Fernandez say they took this image last October to memorialize the breast-feeding stage of their son's life. Below: The Lucca Madonna, painted in the 15th century by the Dutch master Jan van Eyck. Defense lawyers argued that while breast-feeding images are a second-degree felony in Richardson, they are also on public display in the finest art museums in the world.

For Mercado and her family, last fall was a happy time, one they wanted to record and save in the venerable tradition of the family photo. Johnny Fernandez, Mercado's boyfriend, had just emigrated from Lima, Peru, ending a yearlong separation, and on top of that, it was their son's first birthday.

The photographs they took over several days in late October included pictures of Fernandez reunited with the family at their modest home in suburban Richardson. Others captured their 1-year-old son Rodrigo, and 4-year-old Pablizio, from Mercado's earlier marriage, playing in a neighborhood park. Using the camera's timer, they also took three snapshots of themselves, naked in their bed. They arranged their bodies in ways that showed less flesh than most freeway billboards.

A half-dozen others recorded the kids at bath time. Fernandez took several photos of the boys "playing around," naked and innocent, with the oldest flashing a big smile. Mercado, who says she often bathed with the kids, is in several of the shots unclothed from the waist up, holding her arm modestly across her bare chest.

In one--the photo that would threaten to send Mercado and her boyfriend to prison--the infant Rodrigo is suckling her left breast.

After Mercado dropped off the film for processing, a technician viewed the images and decided they were "suspicious," according to a police report. As required under Texas law, he immediately contacted local police. Mercado says that when she went to pick up her pictures, the clerk told her there would be a delay, and then only returned three of the four sets of prints.

To Richardson police, who arrived at the store that afternoon and apparently made up their minds from the content of the pictures alone, this was nothing short of a felony case of child pornography. "We thought they contained sexuality," says Sergeant Danny Martin, a Richardson police spokesman, explaining why two Richardson police detectives began pursuing a criminal case. "If you saw the photos, you'd know what I mean."

With nothing else to support their contention that the photos were related to sex or sexual gratification, the police and the Dallas County District Attorney's Office presented the photos to a grand jury in January and came away with indictments against Mercado and Fernandez for "sexual performance of a child," a second-degree felony punishable by up to 20 years in prison. The charges centered on a single photo, the breast-feeding shot. Fernandez and Mercado say they took it--although the child had ceased breast-feeding--to memorialize that stage of their baby's development.

"We wanted to see if he would take it, and he did," says Mercado, explaining through an interpreter that it was a spur-of-the moment notion to which they gave little thought. "Johnny never saw the child breast-feeding, so this was for memories. For us."

Mercado, who brushed back strands of brown hair from her reddened eyes as she spoke, has a story that has not changed from the start. She told the Richardson police officer who responded to the store's call that she had always taken pictures of her children nude, and that it wasn't uncommon in her native Peru to do so. They were innocent baby pictures, taken for the family's benefit, she said.

Five days later, when a state child welfare investigator and two detectives arrived at her house, Mercado again insisted that she saw nothing wrong with the photos. She allowed the group to search the couple's cramped room, and the detectives went through everything, including their photo albums, apparently looking for more evidence of child porn. They found nothing.

"We fought so hard to come to this country," says Mercado, a 33-year-old who was a nurse in Peru and aspires to become licensed in the United States one day. "For this to happen is unbelievable."

Andrew Chatham, one of three lawyers working on behalf of Mercado and her boyfriend, says it is difficult to imagine a clearer case of over-reaching by police and prosecutors. "Their theory, which is supported by nothing, is that these pictures were taken to satisfy the boyfriend's sexual desires. These aren't pictures that were peddled on the open market. This wasn't on someone's Web site. This is just a mother who took a roll of film and left it off at Eckerd's. The state used them to arrest her, indict her for a felony and take away her kids."

On November 13, the day Richardson police "tossed" or searched Mercado's house, a caseworker with the Dallas County Child Protective Services Unit of the Texas Department of Protective and Regulatory Services took custody of the children and recommended to a family judge that they be placed in a foster home. The caseworker's notes state that a supervisor, acting on the content of the photos alone, decided that "the children needed to be removed from their mother's care."

Her hard-rubbed eyes drooping with worry, Mercado says she told the caseworker, "Please don't take our children. We love our children."
The legal team: Steven Lafuente, Bill Stovall and Andrew Chatham all went to work on the Mercado-Fernandez case.

In the months since, one of the couple's most onerous problems has been resolved. In late March, a week after the Dallas Observer asked District Attorney Bill Hill about the case, he ordered the criminal charges against both parents dropped. "It has some gray areas to it, but it doesn't rise to the level of a crime," Hill said. He said justice comes from more than isolating facts and interpreting them in a way to make them narrowly fit into a criminal statute.

Still, at press time, child welfare authorities continue to maintain control of the boys, even though a lawyer appointed to represent them says he believes they should go home. In its latest legal filing, the state said it would not consent to releasing the boys until the couple jumps through more hoops, including a lie-detector test they must take at their own expense.

"They ripped out my heart," Mercado says. "Even if we get them back, I don't know how we'll recover from what's been done."

"How could they accuse me of doing something with our own children?" says Fernandez, a lanky 35-year-old who worked as a hospital technician in Peru before embarking on his disastrous start in Texas. "How can they accuse us of being something we're not?"

It wasn't difficult at all.
When Andrew Chatham first learned of the Mercado-Fernandez case from lawyer Steven Lafuente, who the family hired at the outset, he was certain there must be more to it than a picture of a mother with an infant's lips on her breast. "I wondered what I wasn't getting," he says. "There had to be more."

There was not.

Police and child welfare files contain no criminal histories, no hint that there were other suspicions or evidence of child abuse or neglect. Mercado and Fernandez had not been in the United States long enough to have histories of much of anything. She arrived in August 2001, moved in with her parents in Richardson and took a job cleaning a nearby Wal-Mart in the middle of the night. Johnny arrived about 13 months later and went to work cleaning stores, too, before moving on to a job in a budget steak house.

By the time Chatham became involved in the case, which his partner Bill Stovall took on without a fee, the parents were devastated and penniless. "I think the police department and the DA's office select people to prosecute who have the least ability to defend themselves," says Chatham, who says he took the case on principle. "If these pictures were on their way back to some big home in Highland Park, they would have turned around and left. They were going after easy marks."

Mercado and Fernandez--who were released on bonds of $10,000 and $12,500, respectively--borrowed money from their family to get out of jail and drew comfort from the help and encouragement they received from their church.

Maybell Palacios, Mercado's aunt, says her niece is as dedicated a mother as she has ever seen. "She'd be working seven days a week at nights, and when she'd come home tired she had time for her children. To feed them. Wash them. Do their clothes."

Victor Jaeger, pastor of the Iglesia Adventista del 7 Dia de Richardson, says, "The community has been very supportive of them. They see it as a big misunderstanding." About a third of his Spanish-speaking Seventh Day Adventist congregation in blue-collar East Richardson is Peruvian-born.

The pastor says he was prepared to testify on the couple's behalf and explain what appears to him to have been a cultural misunderstanding. Jaeger, who grew up in Peru, says breast-feeding is culturally important in his native country and considered acceptable to do in public, particularly in the country's jungle regions. "My cousin sent me a picture of her newborn, and it was of the baby being breast-fed," he says. "As someone who has lived here for 20 years, I asked myself, 'Why did she send me that picture?' To her, it was nothing."

To memorialize the act of breast-feeding in a snapshot is as common in Peru as wanting to save a photo of a first step, or a first two-wheeler, or a first baseball game, he says.

Jaeger says Mercado and Fernandez, who both have roots in rural Peru, "sat in my office crying" on several occasions. He has come to the conclusion that they are good parents caught in an awful bind.

Their most pressing problem was the breast-feeding picture, which the indictment characterized as sexual, "to wit; actual lewd exhibition of...a portion of the female breast below the top of the areola, and the said defendant did and then employ, authorize and induce Rodrigo Fernandez, a child younger than 18 years of age, to engage in said sexual conduct and sexual performance." In other words, says Chatham, the act of simulated breast-feeding, captured on film, was being portrayed as a sex act. "They're saying the guy who took the picture is a sicko and wanted a photo of this to satisfy his sexual desire."

Through the ages, Chatham says, images of breast-feeding have been viewed more as art than deviancy.

*
Mark Graham
Jacqueline Mercado, a 33-year-old Peruvian immigrant, took a few photos of her young children at bath time. A week later, Richardson police were rummaging through her house for kiddie porn, and a state child welfare worker came to take her kids away.

"Look at this," he says, handing over a print of The Lucca Madonna, painted in 1436 by the Dutch master Jan van Eyck. The painting, depicting an enthroned Mary suckling the baby Jesus, hangs in the Stadelsches Kunstinstitut, an art museum in Frankfurt, Germany. "My sister-in-law was an art major in college, and when I told her about this, she said, 'Andy, there are thousands of great works of art portraying the breast-feeding of children. They grace the halls of great art museums around the world. I could have used dozens of others.'"

Adds Stovall, his law partner, "I was just up at Z Gallery last weekend, and there's a print of a woman breast-feeding."

The breast-feeding Madonnas no doubt were done with live models, Chatham says. "You may think it's kooky, but through the ages this is how we've portrayed the bond between mother and child."

In late February, Chatham drafted a legal motion seeking dismissal of the indictments, using The Lucca Madonna as his star exhibit. "The material at issue falls squarely within the ambit of the First Amendment's protection," Chatham wrote in his brief. "The portrayal of the suckling child is found in countless numbers of artwork. Whether the medium is canvas, marble or Kodak film is irrelevant for the purposes of First Amendment protection."

The motion was pending and being studied by an assistant prosecutor in late March when the Observer asked Bill Hill about the Mercado-Fernandez case. "I'll look into it," he said. A week later, he said his assistant thought the case would "wash out of court" on The Lucca Madonna motion, so Hill says he ordered him to dismiss it. "I looked at those pictures and there were some quirky things to them, and I can see where the grand jury had probable cause. But a woman has her breast exposed, and her child is there. I'm not sure that is a prosecutable offense," he says. He says his assistant agreed the case was "weak."

Hill did not fault the work of his assistants who presented the case to the grand jury, or the police who now are reportedly perturbed that their case was dumped. The charges and the couple's arrests were no doubt "traumatic," he says, "but in this instance the system worked."

Not if you are Rodrigo and Pablizio, who have not been returned to their mother yet.

Lieutenant Bill Walsh, head of the Dallas Police Department's youth and family crimes section, says calls from photo labs and computer repair shops are a useful tool in policing child sexual abuse and child pornography. His department makes several important cases a year after being alerted by technicians who stumble across the evidence.

"The law in Texas says all adults must report suspicion of child abuse, but it doesn't set out what the boundaries for that are," he says. Once detectives review the pictures, Walsh says, it is usually a "no-brainer" which ones are the work of abusers and child pornographers and which are innocent pictures of bathing children and "the cute one of the kid whose bathing suit fell off when he ran through the sprinkler." Naked baby pictures and photos of toddlers' backsides are on display in work cubicles and office credenzas all over town.

"We don't see many sticky cases," Walsh says. "Child porn usually isn't subtle."

A photo of a mother breast-feeding, or a couple of smiling kids getting ready for a bath, or, separately, two nude consenting adults, "aren't something we're going to be too concerned with," he says. "The most important thing is to look at the pictures in context. Under what circumstances were they taken."

To make a case against Mercado and Fernandez as parents, Richardson police and CPS investigators made no mention in their reports of any other photos on the four rolls, such as the ones of five kids at a birthday party. They focused only on the naked ones.

"It's like they took something from each one and twisted it to try to make a case," says Lafuente, who is handling the custody side of the couple's legal problems.

In his report to CPS, Richardson Detective John Wakefield wrote, "I viewed the photographs and had concern of possible sexual abuse, inappropriate sexual behavior and possible child pornography from nine [of them]."

The four photos in which Mercado is seen with her forearm closely covering her chest, for instance, Wakefield described thusly: "Mercado is in the photograph topless and touching her breast." In two others he notes that the older boy was "touching his genital area." Mercado told Wakefield, and anyone else who cared, that the boy had a rash and was constantly scratching himself there. She produced a tube of prescription medication to prove he was being treated for the problem, police reports show.

Her explanations and defenses came long before she was forced to hire lawyers, and they have not changed since the day the Richardson officers knocked on her door.

Lafuente says the actions of CPS and criminal authorities tended to reinforce each other, to the family's detriment, as the case has gone along. Meanwhile, nobody was interested in Mercado's and Fernandez's explanations. "I wanted Jacqueline to waive her Fifth Amendment right and testify before the grand jury. They didn't want to hear from her," he says. CPS reports, meanwhile, make prominent mention of the fact that the couple had been indicted on felony charges.

Says Stovall: "The very accusation in this case carries such a bad taste that they automatically assume the worst. I tell you they are charged with possession of child pornography, and you automatically envision the worst possible scenario."

*
Mark Graham

Lafuente says he has been willing to concede that the photos show behavior that some people of a conservative nature might consider inappropriate, such as a mother bathing with her 4-year-old, or being topless around the kids. Yet those hardly rise to the level of sexual abuse. The family lives together in one room, making privacy difficult, but that does not mean Mercado and Fernandez are not loving parents, he says.

At a December 5 hearing on CPS's removal of the children, Lafuente reached a compromise with the state to put them in the temporary custody of Mercado's former husband, who also lives in the Dallas area. Mercado says that in the five months since, he has given her liberal visitation rights, but she and Fernandez cannot be left alone with the children, nor can the children sleep at the couple's house.

They also agreed to attend "group treatment for sexual issues" and submitted to extensive psychological exams.

At the group counseling, Mercado says, she has learned that kids in the United States are subject to the most horrendous abuse. "Their parents are on drugs...They're left with relatives who molest them. It's horrible." None of it seems to apply to her and her boyfriend, she says, although they say they attend the sessions regularly and try to partake.

"It's about as useful as tits on a bull," sniffs Chatham.

In their psychological exams, which they made available for this report, the only problems the experts could discern in interviews with the parents were those heaped on them by CPS and the police. And those, too, seemed to be held against them in the less-than-empirical world of psychoanalysis.

"When asked about problems occurring in his life currently, Mr. Fernandez states that the children have been removed, there is little money for lawyers, and it's all a big injustice," wrote Robert Antonetti, a Dallas psychologist who interviewed the couple earlier this year. "He reported currently feeling anxious, angry at the injustice he is enduring and fearful of what may happen. When asked about coping with stress he said he's been praying a lot."

In his summary and recommendations, Antonetti mentions no evidence of sexual deviancy in either parent. Instead, he concludes that Fernandez "feels very vulnerable to criticism and judgment."

The accusation that you're a sexual deviant who victimizes his own children might tend to do that.

The psychologist divines from his own psychological tests--and no material evidence whatsoever--that Fernandez appeared to be so "anxious to please" that he might be hiding something. "The profile suggests the probability that he attempted to present himself in an improbably favorable light," Antonetti concludes. Hence, the state-hired Antonetti recommended Fernandez be made to take a polygraph test before getting his son back. He recommended Mercado should be hooked up to one, too. He further recommended both should undergo parenting classes, individual counseling and couples counseling.

Two weeks ago, with a deadline looming for the state either to return the children or go back to court and ask to remove them permanently, Dallas Assistant District Attorney April Carter asked the judge in the case to require the parents to take the tests and attend the counseling before anyone goes home. "There are concerns we need to address," says Carter, who is representing CPS in family court. She says the store clerk, the Richardson police, the grand jury and others took issue with the photos and without further proof, "it's not clear whether this was sexual or cultural." She says she believes lie-detector tests would put that question to rest.

At press time, a hearing on that matter was pending. "We're going to fight it," says Lafuente, saying the state has dragged out the matter long enough and has had five months to ask courts to order tests or counseling. He says there might be a disagreement over appropriate parental behavior, but it isn't something that will be settled by psychologists or lie detectors.

Robert Herrera, who was appointed by the family court to represent the interests of the children alone, agrees. "My feeling is at this point the children should be returned to their parents," he says. "I don't know how strongly CPS disagrees with that, but I think this should be resolved without any more trips to court."

If what she and her boyfriend did was wrong, Mercado says, "I'm sorry. I didn't know these pictures were wrong...I just want my children back. They belong with us."

Straight from the tit: Woman charged with possession of child pornography for Taking photos of herself breastfeeding!

*** UPDATE ***
UPDATE WITH SLIGHTLY GOOD NEWS

but wait...there's more!

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 20:33:39 GMT

Oh, Dumplings! This was the Kodak April Fool release! WTF am I doing wasting your time??

Call me Cloacina.

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 20:26:59 GMT

I found this gem as a result of a "normal" conversation I had with a friend of mine, and him goggling "sewer princess".

""In Roman mythology, Cloacina (derived from the Latin word "cloaca" meaning "sewer" or "drain") was the goddess who presided over the Cloaca Maxima, the system of sewers in Rome. The Cloaca Maxima was a sewer said to be begun by Tarquinius Priscus and finished by Tarquinius Superbus. Titus Tatius, who reigned with Romulus, erected a statue to her. She was originally derived from Etruscan mythology. As well as controlling sewers, she was also a protector of sexual intercourse in marriage. Regardless of her original source, she later became identified with Venus."

What?

[sauce]

no explaination

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 18:57:34 GMT

couldn't look at it long enough to check out the website

Exxon Sabotaged Oil Wells Because Owner Wouldn't Cut Royalties

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 17:54:28 GMT

July 17 (Bloomberg) -- Exxon Mobil Corp., the largest U.S. oil company, may be fined more than $1 billion for “malicious” sabotage of wells to prevent other producers from tapping fields it no longer wanted, the Texas General Land Office said.

Jerry Patterson, commissioner of the land office that oversees oil leases that help fund Texas schools, asked the Texas Railroad Commission to conduct hearings into an alleged 1990s program at Exxon Mobil of plugging abandoned wells with trash, sludge, explosives and cement plugs. The barriers made it impossible for other producers to revive the wells, Patterson said in a statement he gave to Bloomberg News yesterday.

Full article at: http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601087&sid=aH4MoH2m4Z0w

*daha*

You know what's wtf to me?

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 16:15:52 GMT

AND JUST TO ADD TO THE HPV INFO:

- It is NOT TESTABLE IN MEN. There is no FDA-approved test for HPV in men. Meaning, men are often carriers and rarely know that they are.
- You can get HPV even if the person you are with aren't having an outbreak (same as herpes, it's always contagious).
- You can get HPV even if you are super healthy.
- You can get HPV even if you use a condom.
- There is NO TREATMENT for HPV. If you have warts, all they do is either freeze or burn them off using liquid nitrogen or acid.
- I mentioned this, but unlike herpes HPV does NOT last forever.
- THE GARDISIL VACCINE ONLY PROTECTS AGAINST 4 COMMON STRAINS OF HPV. Yet, there are 130 strains of HPV that have been identified.

When I think about you, I cut myself

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 09:13:01 GMT

This is what happens to you when you get old

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 06:31:28 GMT

excited about the Futurama return? .. don't hold your breath, just yet.

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 06:19:07 GMT

There may be a recast for Futurama. I don't think it's official, and is probably a industry ploy to get the actors at a lower rate.. but still.. WTF?

the Mother Humping source

Ted ran off with the pool float

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 02:21:39 GMT

Mary had a BIG OLE DONG!

Sat, 18 Jul 2009 23:17:02 GMT

oh hai

Sat, 18 Jul 2009 21:10:28 GMT

Sat, 18 Jul 2009 16:16:29 GMT

Sometimes I just want yous guys to be happy. Have a gift.

Goddamn fetishes...they're so specific.

Sat, 18 Jul 2009 05:08:36 GMT

After the fist 30 seconds you can skip to the end, it's mostly the same weirdness.

Pizza face, meet pizza ass

Sat, 18 Jul 2009 04:03:06 GMT

TITS

Sat, 18 Jul 2009 02:49:15 GMT

Wish you were a bit bigger up top? Envy girls like Halle Berry and Scarlett Johansson? Avoid costly plastic surgery and have a few of these Boob Boosting mints!

...ooookay then

I need to stop Stumbling

Fri, 17 Jul 2009 23:01:05 GMT

While the site itself really isn't wtf the first thing you read on it is.

PU Housetraining Wrappers™

Wrap your dog's penis so he only pees on himself. PU Housetraining Wrappers™ are specially designed to stay on your dog. Training manual included.

Sauce